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Your Story is Our Story: The Adoption and Baptism of My Son

 
"At the deepest level the story of any one of us," Frederick Buechner wrote in his book Yellow Leaves, "is the story of all of us."
Standing on the beach surrounded by 75 friends and family last month, a few minutes before my son was baptized in the Pacific, Buechner's words rolled through my mind like the waves crashing gently on the shore a few yards from my bare feet.
How we all got to that place in the sand on the southern coast of California is an epic story, the best one I know. It is a story of grace and redemption, of God's providence and tenderness, of friendship and the bonds of community that even death cannot sever. It is our story, all of us.
Three years ago, in a humble enclave of mud-and-wattle huts by the side of a dusty African road, I met, by accident (if you believe in such things) the sick little boy who would become my son. At the time, I had no idea how intimately intertwined our lives, and our stories, would become.
When I met Vasco, he was 8 years old, an AIDS orphan who had lived alone on the streets of Malawi for a time. He had a hole in his heart and didn't have long to live. In April 2009, he came to the United States to have life-saving surgery, and today, he is in perfect health. In June, Vasco became my son, legally and forever, when the High Court of Malawi approved our adoption.
Vasco's story is remarkable. I've lived it with him and it still gives me goose bumps. I tell it again and again because it is not just his story or my family's story, but our story -- all of us broken and beautiful human beings. We are all adopted sons and daughters of God, each of us a chosen member of a global and eternal family, stitched together by grace.
My son's baptism was not only a public affirmation of his relationship with God and a commemoration of the day a 30-year-old Nazarene was baptized in the Jordan River by his cousin John 2,000 years ago, it also was a symbol of his adoption into the communion of the saints, living and dead -- the cloud of great witnesses who stood with him on the beach and who watched his big splash from afar (and yet close by, in the spirit.)
Vasco was baptized in the same waters where the ashes of the uncle he never met, "Mr. Mark," were spread. Mark's parents, sister, wife and daughter witnessed Vasco's baptism from the beach with us, while Mark watched from the other side.
2010-10-27-vandbubba.jpg
Before our pastor walked Vasco down to the water to dunk him, Vasco's godfather, whom we call "Uncle Bubba," shared a few words of wisdom with his new godson.
"Vasco, God has given you a wonderful story to tell. Your story of what God did for you is your dad's story, it's your mom's story. And now it's my story, too," he said. "Vasco, this is all of our story. As people we are living lives with hearts that need to be fixed, in places that are unsafe. Jesus comes and gives us new hearts and puts us in a new family and gives us a new name, his name. God has given you a wonderful story and I want you to always tell your story."
Bubba and I have been friends for more than 20 years. We met as freshmen in college and have been inseparable ever since. Our friendship is an unlikely one. He is a farmer from Mississippi, a son of the south and a diehard conservative Five Point Presbyterian. I am a member of the liberal media, a Connecticut Yankee and spiritual traveler. Still, he and I go together like carrots and peas (I'm the carrots).
The only way I can explain our enduring friendship is that God created it and sustains it. The go-between God who makes connections between people that we'd never be able to make on our own, saw these two polar opposite 18 year olds and thought, "Yeah. That's a great match. Watch this!" With that, God knit our stories into one beautiful tapestry of soul friendship.
My friendship with Bubba is perhaps as whimsically unlikely as meeting my son by the side of the road in Malawi was. Both are stories of profound grace as unbelievable as they are true, stories that their author -- God alone -- has now woven magnificently into one.

Bolivian boy has found a family, at last (Canada, not finalised)

 
Bolivian boy has found a family, at last
Record staff
click here to expandJheyson, 11, a Bolivian orphan that the Lisa and Patrick Sc ...
Guardians continues to try to untangle legal red tape to adopt and establish citizenship for the 11-year-old
November 27, 2010
BY VALERIE HILL, RECORD STAFF
Jheyson Schlitt seems oblivious to the turmoil brewing around him.
“I just cry and cry,” said his guardian, Lisa Schlitt who along with her husband Patrick, is desperately trying to adopt the 11 year old, although there is no adoption agreement between Canada and his home country of Bolivia.
Lisa knew from the outset the process would be difficult, battling policies of a country with deep national pride and a disjointed court system. She did find one loophole which allowed the Schlitt’s to get Jheyson into Canada, and they gave him their last name to make the boy feel loved, feel at home. Patrick said “he’s never had a family.”
Jheyson had been in Bolivian orphanages since 10 months old having no idea that a world away was a woman who would sacrifice everything to be the boy’s mother.
In Sept. 2006, the Kitchener woman and her mother Carol Dolezsar, of Cambridge, decided to volunteer as well as raise money for an orphanage in Bolivia, a country where Lisa had a friend.
Searching the internet, they found several possibilities though only one responded to the offer, a children’s mission near the city of Cochabamba in central Bolivia.
With her family’s help, Lisa raised $7,000 in donations before leaving for Bolivia where she set out to prove that individuals can make a difference. What she found was unexpected.
The Record featured Lisa in March 2008, after a poem she created about Jheyson was published in Chicken Soup for the Adopted Soul.
“There was no expression in his face, he just stood by himself,” she recalled. “I hugged him.”
Jheyson’s face was expressionless; his body slumped as if he’d simply given up.
“He had been picked on, labeled having a learning disability,” she said. “For two weeks, I took him everywhere with me, we ate popsicles, went to the park, went to the market. He was seven years old. While we were there, the difference was huge. He was smiling.” Jheyson also started calling her Mom but only too soon, it was time for Lisa to come home, leaving a tearful Jheyson behind with a promise she would bring him to Canada.
“I called him several times a week,” she said. “I left him, but I had other contacts, they kept an eye on him.” She also contacted a lawyer in Bolivia to start adoption proceedings. “They wanted money up front with zero guarantees,” she said.
Jheyson, who knew rudimentary English, worked at mastering the language while Lisa worked at bringing him to Canada though Bolivia’s bureaucratic wheels grind slowly and often backwards. His birth certificate was lost, important documents were misplaced, lawyers moved on, judges were reassigned, one problem lead to the next.
Then, disaster struck. Jheyson’s orphanage came under government investigation and many of the children were moved to other facilities. She called her friends in Bolivia.
“I panicked, and called them and asked them to take him,” she said. “There are 80 orphanages in that city. It would be impossible to find him again.”
Fortunately, Jheyson did not get caught in the shuffle. Lisa boarded a plane for Bolivia and while there, applied for a Visa for Jheyson. “He came three weeks later,” she said, escorted by the wife of the orphanage’s former director. The Bolivian courts agreed to give Lisa, a personal support worker and Patrick, a funeral director, legal guardianship while the boy was in a Canadian school.
The Schlitts had prepared a room for him, wrapped Christmas presents in December then purchased a Halloween costume the following October. When he finally arrived, Nov. 7, 2008 they celebrated.
“Because he has a learning disability, he can come to Canada to go to school,” she explained. The couple was taken aback to learn the Waterloo Region District School Board charges $14,200 per year for an international student but luckily, they discovered the 38-student Carmel New Church School, an independent Christian facility in Kitchener charged $3,520 a year. “They’re phenomenal,” said Lisa, noting Jheyson no longer exhibits learning disabilities.
Jheyson is part of their family, but the story hasn’t ended. “We have custody from the courts in Bolivia and Canada recognizes that, but they won’t give him permanent residency,” she said. Without it, Jheyson does not qualify for citizenship, health care or education. Every cent must come from the Schlitt’s pocketbook and with four biological children at home ranging from 12 to 18, it’s a heavy financial burden.
Patrick estimates that between lawyers and consultants it’s cost them around $30,000, but it’s not about the money. “We don’t mind paying for him,” he said. “It would be nice to see an end point. You’re shooting in the dark.”
“Lisa has gone through so much,” said Kitchener immigration consultant, Douglas Dunnington, who has witnessed the level of care and love Jheyson has received with the Schlitts. “This little guy warrants facility (in Canada).”
Jheyson entered the country on a visa, and received visitor’s status which ran out after six months. Dunnington successfully applied for an extension which is about to run out Dec. 31. He’s applying for a second extension, trying to keep the boy in Canada while Lisa and Patrick run the gauntlet of adoption proceedings.
“What are we going to do, send him back?” questioned Dunnington. “Let’s hope some common sense applies.”

Written Question Roberta Angelilli (PPE) & Reply

Parliamentary questions
27 September 2010
E-6272/2010
Answer given by Mrs Reding on behalf of the Commission
The Commission is aware and shares the Honourable Member's concerns with regard to the situation of abandoned children and children placed in orphanages in Romania.
The Commission is aware of the Romanian Law No 273/2004 which restricts international adoption to relatives up to the third degree. Matters related to international adoptions fall solely under the national competence of the Member States.
As regards the quality of orphanages, a recent study(1) financed by the Commission confirms that institutional care is often of unacceptably poor quality and that conditions in institutional care may sometimes constitute serious breaches of internationally accepted human rights standards. Although matters related to child protection systems, social inclusion of children and the administration of childcare institutions fall under the competence of the Member States, the Commission seeks to promote a high quality of social protection for children in the EU. The Commission supports the exchange of good practice and policy coordination through the open method of coordination in the field of social protection and inclusion. In its 2009 Joint Report on Social Protection and Social Inclusion(2), the Commission identified a number of National Action Plans in which Member States recognise the need to combine a universal approach for children's well-being with a more targeted approach for children in vulnerable situations.
On 23 September 2009, the Ad Hoc Expert Group on the Transition from Institutional to Community-based Care submitted a report which addressed the issue of institutional care reform(3). One of the recommendations refers to the ratification and implementation of the United Nations Convention on the Rights of Persons with Disabilities, which has been signed by both the (then) European Community and its 27 Member States, including Romania(4). To comply with the obligations stemming from the Convention, EU Member States will need to reform their institutional care and long-term care services to ensure that persons with disabilities (including children) have access to services and facilities meeting their needs and allowing them to be included in the community.
The EU structural funds provide financial support to Member States' actions in the field of social protection. Under the 2007?13 financial perspective, one of the main objectives of the European Social Fund (ESF) is to promote social inclusion and equal opportunities. Romania has available funds under the ESF to help 5 400 young people leaving the institutions integrate into the labour market and society, by raising their job-related and social skills. Moreover, 10 000 professionals in the field of social inclusion will be trained to work with such vulnerable groups as children in residential institutions or leaving such institutions.
In addition, financial support for improving the social infrastructure is provided to Romania under European Regional Development Fund (ERDF), within the Regional Operational Programme 2007?13. The programme comprises a specific allocation to facilitate citizens' access to essential services, improve infrastructure in the field of health, education, social and public safety in emergency situations. The programme finances projects proposed by local authorities for rehabilitation, modernization, development and equipping of the multifunctional or residential social centres buildings. The list of social projects which were selected up to now by Romanian authorities for financing under 2007?13 Cohesion policy is posted on the site www.fonduri-ue.ro.


 

 

 

Parliamentary questions
17 August 2010
E-6272/2010
Question for written answer 
to the Commission 
Rule 117
Roberta Angelilli (PPE)

 Subject: Alarming situation of orphans in Romania
 Answer(s) 
The alarming situation of abandoned children in Romania has become an increasingly serious and burning issue following the approval of Romanian Law No 273/2004 restricting intercountry adoptions to relatives up to the third degree. This restriction has led to an exponential rise in the number of Romanian children entrusted to orphanages. Moreover, under Romanian law, Romanian orphans lose their entitlement to child protection services on reaching the age of 18 and thus risk facing social exclusion and poverty. In some cases, they are also exploited by prostitution networks. Unfortunately, these minors include many young girls, some of them under the age of 14, who are deluded by promises of a better life in another country.
The Community institutions have consistently sought to uphold human rights, in particular children's rights, and all the EU Member States consider paedophilia, the exploitation of prostitution and trafficking in human organs to be criminal offences, punishable in their courts.
1. Is the Commission aware of the above developments and the current situation of orphans in Romania?
2. What measures could, in its view, be taken to protect Romanian children placed in orphanages?
3. Will it provide an overview of the situation?
Original language of question: IT

Adoption Forum

11-27-2010, 10:43 AM

Cecile81

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Join Date: Nov 2010

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Two held by Northern Police for child trafficking

Two held by Northern Police for child trafficking
Page last updated at Friday, November 26, 2010 10:10 AM // Leave Your Comment
Two Burkinabe’s; Fuseini Ibrahim and Seetu Nuhu, both 30, are being held by the Northern Regional Police Command for allegedly trafficking 13 children from Burkina Faso to Ghana.

The children aged between 4-15 are currently being given temporary shelter and meals by the Northern Regional Police and would be handed over to the Social Welfare Department for special care.

Chief Inspector Ebenezer Tetteh, Public Relations Officer for the Northern Police Command, was briefing some newsmen in Tamale on Thursday saying that investigation had already started on the case.

He said the police had information that Fuseini Ibrahim was travelling with the 13 children towards a lorry station to transport the children to Burkina Faso after travelling with them for two days on foot from Zinidom in the Karaga District of the Northern Region hence his arrest.

Chief Inspector Tetteh said Ibrahim who was in the company of the children said Seetu Nuhu brought the children from Burkina Faso to be taught in an Arabic school in which he (Seetu) was a teacher.

He said the suspects claimed the children were put in their care for Arabic tuition adding that one of the parents of the children had reported to the police and investigation caution statement taken from him to assist in investigation
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Le Blogueur, cette semaine : Le choix d’adopter

26 NOVEMBRE 2010 À 13H30

Le Blogueur, cette semaine : Le choix d’adopter

Jusqu’où peut aller le « choix » d’un enfant, de son âge, de ses origines ou de sa couleur de peau, quand on souhaite adopter ? 
 

  •  
  • Le Blogueur se penche sur les réalités européennes d’un phénomène devenu glamour à Hollywood : l’adoption internationale et le droit de « choisir » son enfant. En Europe, les critères diffèrent d’un pays à l’autre.

    Le Blogueur enquête en Espagne, grand pays adoptant qui accompagne paternellement les parents, en leur donnant entre autres le choix du pays d’origine de leur futur enfant.

    En Grande-Bretagne au contraire, on évite l’adoption internationale afin de favoriser la proximité ethnique. La ressemblance entre les parents et l’enfant fait partie des critères permettant son adoption par le couple. L’adoption sans tabou ? 

    Quant à la Roumanie, longtemps premier vivier d’enfants dans le monde, elle interdit aujourd’hui à l’Europe l’adoption de ses enfants alors qu’elle en a 70 000 sur les bras… Au nom de la lutte contre le trafic d’enfants, peut-on refuser à toute une génération le droit d’être adoptée ? Car dans cette histoire, plus personne n’a le choix…


    N'ésitez pas à envoyer vos idées ou vos liens pour les prochaines émissions !

 

11.000 de copii in orfelinatele romanesti. Ce face statul pentru ei?-TvZiare.com

11.000 de copii in orfelinatele romanesti. Ce face statul pentru ei?-TvZiare.com
    
Foto: TV Ziare.com
In cele 256 de orfelinatele din Romania, din care 142 vechi, sunt 11.000 de copii si, cu toate ca numarul lor este in scadere, statul, Biserica si institutiile neguvernamentale ar trebui sa se implice mai mult in a-i ajuta, este de parere Stefan Darabus, directorul Hope&Homes for Children Romania.

"Adoptia este o solutie pentru orfelinate, dar este nevoie de modificarea Legii adoptiilor si de o relaxare a consimtamantului parintilor biologici. Avem in derulare cu ministerul Muncii si Grupul la Nivel Inalt 'Copiii Romaniei' o serie de parteneriate care vizeaza continuarea procesului de inchidere a institutiilor din Romania, astfel incat aceastia sa reprezinte in 2020 doar istorie. 

Numarul copiilor din institutii este in scadere, sunt tot mai multe orfelinate care se inchid, este un trend de 7-8 ani care continua. Nu mai poate sustine nimeni ca institutiile sunt o alternativa, copiii au nevoie de o familie", a precizat Stefan Darabus, la Tv Ziare.com.

In ceea ce priveste situatia financiara a acestor instututii, in tara, posibiliatile de autofinantare sunt foarte reduse, insa exista fonduri de la UE si de la organizatiile pentru protectia copiilor care ajung in Romania, spijinindu-le.

"Cheltuielile pentru un copil tin de cheltuilile de perosonal, de hrana, imbracaminte, apa, gaz, curent, ca si pentru orice alt copil. In cazul in care aceste cheltuieli s-ar face intr-un mediu familial si nu institutional, ele ar fi mai mici", a continuat invitatul TV Ziare.com.

Desi banii sunt putini, conditiile din orfelinate s-au imbunattatit si nu mai vedem "imaginile de acum 10 ani", caci in prezent "peretii sunt zugraviti, mobilierul e nou, exista televizoare, sunt intr-un mediu mai bun decat erau inainte".

Cu toate acestea, copiii din orfelinate nu au Internet, pentru ca nu au voie la acces nesupravegheat la continutul virtual. "Trebuie protejati de continutul virtual. Nu stiu daca asta s-ar putea face in aceste institutii. Sunt prea putini membri de personal ca sa-i poate supraveghea", a precizat Darabus.

Pentru ca numarul celor care intorc capul catre acesti copii este destul de mic, directorul Hope&Homes for Children Romania a facut apel la Biserica sa-i ajute mai mult pe micutii fara o familie.

"Biserica ar putea face mult mai mult pentru ajutorarea cauzelor sociale, fie ca este vorba de copii sau de familii vulnerabile. Implicarea Bisericii exista la nivel de documente si hartii scrise. Ar fi binevenita o accentuare a implicarii sale si poate ca unele dintre sumele de bani pe care le aloca pentru construirea de noi lacasuri de cult ar putea sa fie redirectionate si catre cauze sociale", a opinat Stefan Darabus. 

"Noi, in mod particular, investim o buna pare din sursele noastre de finantare pentru dezvoltarea de servicii de tip familial, centre familiale, retele de asistenti maternali, astfel incat nevoia fiecarui copil sa fie acoperita intr-un mod cat mai individual", a continuat seful Hope&Homes.

Vestea buna pentru orfelinate este ca, de cand a inceput criza, nu s-a observat o crestere a numarului de copii institutionalizati. Insa, pentru ca vine iarna, este posibil ca numarul lor sa creasca usor.

Adaptarea in societate, foarte grea spre imposibila

Copiii care cresc in orfelinate au sanse mai mici de a se integra in societate in momentul in care parasesc instituiile in care au crescut. 

"Nu sunt pregatiti, nu au avut modele de viata, tinerii care parasesc insitutiile sunt dintre cei mai vulnerabili. In orfelinate, copiii sunt cu foarte multi alti copii in jurul lor, nu au timp sa-si lege niste relatii personale stabile, de lunga durata. Copiii si membrii de personal vin si pleaca. 

Este o problema legarea de relatii pe termen lung, cand ajung la viata adulta. Mai mult, pentru toti cei din jurul nostru este o perioada grea ca sa isi gaseasca un loc de munca, pentru ei este cu atat mai greu", a precizat Stefan Darabus.

Pentru ca acesti copii sa poata duce o viata normala, directorul Hope&Homes for Children Romania crede ca incurajarea adoptiilor sau preluarea acestora de catre asistenti maternali ar fi o solutie.

"Sunt foarte multe familii care vor sa adopte copii. Pocesul de adoptie dureza intre un an si doi ani, asta inseamna finalizarea juridica. Procesul de potrivire incepe de cand copilul este plasat in familie si se poate face la o saptamana-doua. (..)Adoptiile internationale au fost o problema foarte mare in sistemul de protectie a copilului. Era un comert, fratii erau despartiti, plasarile se faceau fara un proces de potrivire si se facea in favoarea familiei adoptive si in favoarea copilului", a tinut sa precizeze invitatul Ziare.com.

Mai mult, sunt cateva zeci de mii de asistenti maternali (aproximativ 13-14.000), dar, din pacat,e facilitatile pe care le au sunt destul de restranse din cauza crizei. 

"Odata cu toate scaderili salariale, si veniturile asitentilor maternali au fost reduse", a conchis Stefan Darabus, directorul Hope&Homes for Children Romania.
Vineri, 26 Noiembrie 2010, ora 19:45
Sursa: Ziare.com
Autor: Alina Bardas
Articol citit de 325 ori
 

Legea adop?iei a fost depus? la Parlament, în form? final?

Legea adop?iei a fost depus? la Parlament, în form? final?

de Admin » 16 Noi 2010 10:15

Proiectul redeschide procedurile pentru adop?iile interna?ionale ?i elimin? obstacolele de care se lovesc acum cei care vor s? înfieze un copil

Asocia?ia Catharsis Bra?ov a înregistrat recent, la Cancelaria Parlamentului României, ultima variant? a Proiectului de lege privind adop?ia în România, completat? cu propuneri trimise de speciali?ti ai serviciilor publice sociale ?i ai unor ONG-uri din ?ar?.

Astfel, în prevederile propuse termenul de „adop?ie na?ional?” va defini adop?ia încredin?at? familiilor care î?i au domiciliul stabil în România. „Adop?ie intracomunitar?” va însemna adop?ia încuviin?at? familiilor sau persoanelor cu domiciliul în ??rile membre UE, iar „adop?ia interna?ional?” va fi adop?ia încuviin?at? persoanelor sau familiilor cu domiciliul stabil în statele semnatare ale Conven?iei de la Haga.

Forcible foster care ‘genocide’: UN Declaration

  Forcible foster care ‘genocide’: UN Declaration
WRITTEN BY ADMINISTRATOR
THURSDAY, 25 NOVEMBER 2010 11:38
UOI OFFICES (November 24, 2010) – Anishinabek have the right to keep their children in their own communities, including those who require foster care.
“Other governments must put a stop to the harm that has been caused to thousands of our kids – first in residential schools, then in foster homes,” said Deputy grand Chief Glen Hare. “They have to give us the resources our communities need to look after our own children; their welfare is more important than providing jobs for outside agencies.”
“And now that Canada has finally endorsed the United Nations Declaration on the Rights of Indigenous Peoples,” he added, “it needs to understand that forcibly removing children from one group of peoples to another is considered genocide by the standards of international law.”
Hare noted that a Human Rights complaint has been filed against Canada for its funding of First Nations child welfare agencies across the country at an average of 22 per cent less than the budgets of provincial agencies like Children’s Aid Societies.
The Anishinabek Nation established the Union of Ontario Indians as its secretariat in 1949. The UOI is a political advocate for 40 member communities across Ontario, representing approximately 55,000 people. The Union of Ontario Indians is the oldest political organization in Ontario and can trace its roots back to the Confederacy of Three Fires, which existed long before European contact.
For more information contact:

Marci Becking
Communications Officer
Union of Ontario Indians
Phone: (705) 497-9127 (ext. 2290)
Cell: (705) 494-0735
E-mail: becmar@anishinabek.ca
Follow AnishNation on Twitter

Some chiefs in the Northern Region recently called for the abolition

Some chiefs in the Northern Region recently called for the abolition
of practice of adoption and expressed anger with the practice particularly the provision in the adoption law that hands
adopting parents complete ownership of the adoptees.
The chiefs expressed the anger in Mzuzu at a function organised by The Law Commission aimed at getting views
from civil society on what should be included in the reviewed and Adoption Law which is being tailored ‘to reflect
modern issues.’
“Adoption should end; it’s like selling a thing that does not speak. Orphans always have relatives and whatever law
we implement, it will always bring us problems in the future,” said Inkosi Mtwalo of Mzimba.
T/A Mwakaboko of Karonga said he understood the idea of adoption but did not like the permanent ownership of by
others rather than natural parents.
“Just look at Jumani [Johansson]. We are having problems now because his name was changed and his natural
parents cut off,” said Mwakaboko.
He, however, said whoever puts his child for adoption should not demand tokens because assistance rendered to the
child is enough for the parent to be thankful.
T/A Marlowe of Rumphi said he was against the permanent ownership phrase in the law and said those wishing to
adopt should only assist in providing for the child. T/A Mkumpha 3 of Likoma and Chizumulu Islands shared the
view.
However, Alan Chinula, a commissioner in the exercise, said the chiefs’ fears are baseless since the child can choose
to go back to their parents after reaching maturity age.
He added that the new adoption law would make it tougher for foreigners to adopt in Malawi saying child shopping
would end and that the matching process would be emphasised.
Northern Chiefs calls for an end to adoption practices | Malawi Voice http://www.malawivoice.com/latest-news/northern-chiefs-calls-for-an-...
2 von 7 24.11.2010 15:20
He asked government to adopt the Hague Convention which he said
would be an additional tool in the adoption exercise as it centralises adoption and reinforces the Convention on the
Rights of the Child (CRC).
Social workers who attended the function accused chiefs of hypocrisy saying they were just defensive adding that
they were not looking after the children in the villages.
The current Adoption of Children Act was enacted in 1929; a law which, chairperson of the Special Law Commission
on the Adoption Act, Justice Esme Chombo, said is too old and doesn’t reflect issues like HIV, poverty and
modernity.