330 parents in state waiting to adopt children, says govt

Panaji: A total of 330 parents in Goa are on the wait-list for adoption as on date, women and child development minister Vishwajit Rane told the assembly in reply to a question by Benaulim MLA Venzy Viegas.

Over the past five years, 77 children — from 2-month-olds to 15-year-olds — have been adopted from Goa by parents from Goa and other states.

Nineteen out of the 77 children were given in adoption to parents in Goa and the rest to parents in Maharashtra, Karnataka, Kerala, Andhra Pradesh, Tamil Nadu, Bengal, Telangana, Rajasthan, New Delhi and even US through inter-country adoption.

During this same period, 55 older children, mostly teenagers, were taken under foster care by foster parents. Over the past five years, however, 12 older children given under foster care were returned and five children given for adoption were returned.

The reasons given for returning foster children ranged from the child and foster parents not being able to adjust with each other, the foster parent not willing to continue to take care of the child, the child not able to adjust and not ready to stay with foster parents, the child not being able to bond with the foster mother and behavioural and discipline issues of the child.

In the case of the five adopted children who were returned over the past five years, the reasons ranged from the adoptive parents not able to adjust, the parents backing out feeling incompetent, problematic child behaviour, child emotionally attached to old friends and no bonding between child and adoptive mother.

Older foster children are mostly those who have lived in child care institutions their whole life and often find it difficult to adjust to a family set up, a stakeholder said.

A counsellor guides both the foster child and the foster parents through the foster journey.

Initially the child who is willing to be put up for foster care, is sent to the family on weekends and holidays to bond. Only when they are ready, the foster care order is passed and the child goes to stay as a family member.

“We have seen cases where the foster parents and the teenager adjust very well during short visits, but problems occur after the actual foster care order is passed and when they start living together," the stakeholder said.

"These teenagers have often grown up in an institute and are used to a particular system with no exposure to what family is. They want their own space and once under foster care, they feel they have come under the authority of the family,” a stakeholder said.

“Parents can simply go back and say they cannot handle the child and the child becomes a victim of this circus,” she said.

One foster parent advanced in age complained that the teenager was always watching movies. Another foster parent objected to the teenager going out to talk to friends, instead of staying at home with her.

“A foster mother told us, she was providing shelter and food and hence wanted the foster child to stay at home and look after her. We told her that in that case she should have opted for a caretaker instead, but she said it was too expensive,” the stakeholder said.

An official from the dept of women and child development advised parents thinking of adoption to register on the CARA portal early on. “Often we find that couples waste years deliberating on whether to adopt a child and when they finally take the decision, there’s a long waiting period and as they have advanced in age, they are permitted to adopt only older children,” the official said.