I don't expect answers to all my questions, but they do keep me busy.
Binita Pinoy (28) traveled from Nepal to Belgium with her Flemish adoptive parents when she was four. She grew up in a suburb of Leuven, but moved to Mechelen with her boyfriend two years ago. "I feel more and more like a Mechelen resident," she says.
I was born in Nepal but was adopted by a Flemish couple when I was four. I don't have many memories of that period, neither of my first years in Nepal nor of my arrival in Belgium. I was able to reconstruct some of it using photos and videos my adoptive parents took. It's funny: in those videos, you see me speaking Nepali, even though I don't speak a word of Nepali anymore.
It's always been clear to me that I was adopted. There was no secret about it. That was difficult, since I have a different skin color. Only later in life did I delve deeper into my own identity and the topic of adoption, and did I even address the emotional side of it. There was a period when I identified solely as Belgian and wanted to be recognized as such. I wanted little or nothing to do with Nepal. But the reverse also happened, where I valued everything non-Belgian more. Later, I came to embrace both backgrounds more. Today, I still feel more Belgian in some situations and more non-Belgian in others.
My parents and I always stayed in touch through letters, using an intermediary in Nepal. Little is known about my biological mother, but through that intermediary, I kept in touch with my biological father and sister. That way, we stayed informed about each other's lives. It was my sister who first asked if I wanted to come visit.
