Sing your redemption song elsewhere

Directorate of Child Protection bans celebrations, birthdays and such, of outsiders at child care centres

Have you any idea what children at child care centres or orphanages may feel while you celebrate your birthday

or anniversary with them? Perhaps you simply make them realise they don’t have what you do.

Children at these facilities — where some of them don’t even know their birth dates — ask caretakers when their

turn would come to celebrate.

People often think distributing gifts, taking photos, cutting cakes and eating together would make children at

care homes happy, and by doing so they are making a difference in these children’s lives. However, the fact is,

more often than not, they are making the kids realise how they are different from everyone.

Taking note, Directorate of Child Protection banned all celebrations inside child care institutes and directed the

institutes/centres not to organise any such events any more.

According to Pallavi Akurathi, IAS, director of Integrated Child Protection Scheme, it is not right to make

children feel that they are living off charity which would affect their mental health. They would start to compare

themselves to others, Akurathi added.

“I’m a mother. I know how children compare themselves with other children and feel bad for not having the

same privileges or being able to afford it. At all child care institutes, we celebrate birthdays once in a month.

When children see others celebrating individually, they feel bad. Birthdays are a very sensitive occasion for

children and it is natural for them to question an outsider celebrating birthday at a centre,” said Akurathi.

She added that she had noticed many celebrities and politicians celebrate their birthdays at the child care

institutes, even during the pandemic: “Many take credit just for visiting these children and upload photographs

along with them on social media, which is for their happiness, and not for the children. They are not supposed to

take photos of the children or circulate them. We have banned people from celebrating any events or giving any

food brought from outside to the children in both government-run child care institutes as well as government aided care centres. Interested parties can make donations to the shelters without having to publicise or make the

children feel they are living off charity.”

…recognise the right of every child to a standard of living adequate for the child’s physical, mental, spiritual,

moral and social development.

— Article 27, United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child

Nagasimha G Rao, director of Child Rights Trust, said all NGOs and child care centres must avoid any outsider

celebrating their personal events inside the premises: “I have spoken to many children at care centres. Some of

them asked me when it would be their turn to celebrate. They feel bad thinking about the tragedy in their life and

say that they could have celebrated if their parents were alive or had not abandoned them. Most of the children at

the child care institutes would have had a rough past and in all probability may have been rescued from beggary

or abusive families. After celebrating their birthdays or anniversaries, people give the children used clothes and

toys thinking they would be happy receiving these. The reality is they feel bad seeing the other child who

celebrated her birthday along with them wearing new clothes, and then themselves receiving used clothes

instead.”

According to article 27 of the United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child, one cannot provide leftover

food or used items to children as they have the right to a standard of living that is good enough to meet their

physical and mental needs.

“It keeps reminding the children that they don’t have what others do and pushes them to think they don’t fit into

the society,” Rao told Mirror.

H Ramu Jogihalli, chairperson of Child Welfare Committee, Bengaluru Rural, said a lot of local leaders used to

visit the child care institute to celebrate their birthdays or their children’s. “Children at the care centres would

often say if they were rich they too could have celebrated their birthdays like others. They see others cut the cake

and distribute gifts or food. They come to us and ask if their birthdays too would be celebrated that way. To

pacify them, we celebrate two to three children’s birthdays together on their birth month to make them not feel

left out. Though we ask people not to take photos with children, people often end up taking photos of the

celebrations and upload them on social media which would have an adverse impact on the children and their

mental health,” Jogihalli told BM.

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