Her big dream was crushed - now the children's room is left empty

by Espen Slavensky

The children's room is clear, and she has looked at pictures and videos of the adopted child she was matched with again and again.

Louise Stenstrup shows a picture on the chest of drawers in the decorated but empty children's room

- This is my son, who is waiting in South Africa, she says.

She was happy when she was told in August that there was finally a match. She was to be the adoptive mother of a boy from an orphanage in South Africa.

And she threw herself into making the room in the apartment in inner Copenhagen ready to receive him.

- I hope that at some point we can be happy together.

But the joy of anticipation is currently on standby. It has been replaced with frustration and uncertainty.

- Now it's just an empty room, which may never be more lively than it is now.

It was Tuesday 16 January that Louise Stenstrup's future dreams were punctured from one moment to the next.

Here, Social Affairs Minister Pernille Rosenkrantz-Theil (S) appeared on the TV screen with the message that she was shutting down all international adoptions and that the situation is serious.

- It creates insecurity in particular for those who are on a waiting list or have been matched with a child, but also for those who have already adopted, said the minister.

The time horizon is unclear

Right now, the scheme is suspended for a period, and the time horizon is therefore unclear, Pernille Rosenkrantz-Theil told TV 2.

- I cannot say when we can possibly reopen again and under what rules. As the situation is now, there is a total crisis in the field of international adoption, said the minister.

Pernille Rosenkrantz-Theil could therefore not answer to TV 2 whether the period will be short, medium or will last forever. Because right now there are no organizations responsible for adoption mediation in Denmark.

Louise Stenstrup's adoption case will still be finalized by the Appeals Board, but she fears that the Minister of Social Affairs' announcement may mean that her case will be rejected.

- The Appeals Board, as a political organization, is subject to the Ministry of Social Affairs. When the Minister of Social Affairs shuts down adoptions with undocumented claims about child trafficking, the Danish Appeals Board will be super careful with what they approve.

Louise Stenstrup is far from alone in her frustration.

7 others are about to have their case heard at the Danish Appeals Board, and 36 couples or single people were on the waiting list when the Minister of Social Affairs slammed the door.

Every morning you wake up and hope that the pain you have has disappeared while you have been sleeping

Cathrine Sortberg Vestergaard

Relive the pain over and over again

The adoption freeze has also had major consequences for a couple in Birkerød.

- I was at work and got the message. And all of a sudden the world just changed in a split second, says Sebastian Sortberg Vestergaard about 16 January, when the adoption moratorium was introduced.

Sebastian and Cathrine Sortberg Vestergaard were first on the adoption list in Thailand. Now it is not certain whether they can even be allowed to adopt. Photo: Niels Knuth/TV2 Kosmopol.

Together with his wife, Cathrine Sortberg Vestergaard, they decided four years ago to adopt because they could not have children themselves.

- Pretty quickly we decided to say: "It doesn't work", and so it was natural for us to choose international adoption as an option.

On that fateful day in January, they were number one on the waiting list for a child from Thailand. But now that dream may be extinguished forever.

- It is a very unreal situation. Every morning you wake up and hope that the pain you have has disappeared while you have been sleeping. But then you wake up to a new day, where you go through the same pain over and over again.

Myndighederne har sat adoption af udenlandske børn på stand by - og konsekvenserne for de mennesker, der har glædet sig til snart at skulle være forældre, er enorme.

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5:21

Afspil / pause

Louise's hopes were dashed: "Now it's just an empty room" Video: TV 2 Kosmopol

The couple from Birkerød believe that the Minister of Social Affairs overreacted when she suddenly shut down international adoptions.

- It is true that you want to ensure that the adoption is in the best interests of the child. But it is very inappropriate that the Minister of Social Affairs compares the terrible things that happened in the 1970s and 1980s with the way adoptions take place today, says Cathrine Sortberg Vestergaard.

In recent years, several media have revealed that many adopted children were involuntarily removed from their parents and sold 20 to 30 years ago. Most recently, DR has produced a documentary series with the title 'The great adoption theft'. The series premiered a few days after the social minister's announcement.

But Louise Stenstrup does not believe that the sins of the past should ruin future adoptions:

- It is important that the mistakes of the past come to light. But it is an important nuance that the past is not the present, and the past should not define the future either, says Louise Stenstrup.

The legislation on adoptions has been tightened several times in recent years.

Today, it is a long process to adopt, where the Danish Appeals Authority is the supervisory authority, to ensure that there is no cheating with the adoptions.

- Fortunately, the legislation has been tightened today, so that adoptions take place safely, says Louise Stenstrup.

I don't just feel like I can replace one child with another child. So if we fail to bring him home here, then the light is finally extinguished

Louise Stenstrup

The Board of Appeal has several times criticized DIA, Danish International Adoption, which, until the organization chose to close on 16 January, was Denmark's only mediation organization for adoption.

According to the Danish Appeals Board, DIA has not been able to meet the requirements of the Adoption Act, so it is ensured that there is no one who makes money from adoptions.

Therefore, the Danish Appeals Board has recommended that there be stricter supervision of adoption cases. But the Danish Appeals Board has not recommended that all adoptions be shut down completely.

Therefore, the many adoption couples on the waiting list believe that the Minister of Social Affairs is overreacting.

- We think it is worrying that the Minister of Social Affairs does not follow the Board of Appeal's assessment and recommendations. And it is also very far-reaching in relation to the errors that have been found in today's cases.

Shaming adoptive families

At the same time, they believe that the Minister of Social Affairs, with his sanction and rhetoric, helps to stigmatize all adoptees in Denmark and those who wish to adopt.

- We ourselves have been called human traffickers. The debate about adoption is extremely fierce. And it is, among other things, because we have a minister who uses harsh words about adoptions without support from the Danish Appeals Board. It helps to legalize a national shaming of a family form that thousands of Danes hold close to their lives.

For Louise Stenstrup, it is a lifelong dream that will burst if her case is rejected. So she will not try adoption again.

- I don't just feel that I can replace one child with another child. So if it is not possible to bring him home here, then the light is definitely off, notes Louise Stenstrup.

TV 2 Kosmopol has tried in vain to get a comment from Social Affairs Minister Pernille Rosenkrantz-Theil.