Elisabeth wanted to know the truth about her own adoption. After two years of searching, she was not only reunited with her mother, but she also found an unknown adoption archive.
Illegal adoptions
In January 2022, Elisabeth Fjalsett (49) and her husband Henrik Fjalsett are at home in Arendal when they watch the documentary series "Norway Behind the Facade" about Norwegian foreign adoptions.
The program uncovers several objectionable aspects of adoptions from abroad. Both unethical and criminal methods have been used to find children who are later adopted to Norway.
Across Europe, serious failures in adoption mediation are being uncovered from all continents of the world. There is nothing to indicate that Norway is not affected by the same serious findings.
This is the adoption scandal:
- TV 2, VG and several other media outlets have uncovered illegal adoptions and inadequate control by Norwegian authorities over several decades.
- Across Europe, international adoption practices have been investigated, and the findings are very serious.
- This has led to the Minister of Children and Family Affairs setting up an external investigative committee to survey Norwegian adoption practices.
- On April 17, Bufdir recommended that Norwegian authorities temporarily halt all adoptions to Norway pending the investigation. They fear that illegalities may still occur in current adoption practices.
- Minister of Children and Family Affairs Kjersti Toppe has not yet decided on a temporary suspension.
- Norway is one of the countries in the world that has adopted the most children in relation to its population.
Show more
Elisabeth, who herself was adopted from Bangladesh, therefore begins to cheat.
What about her adoption? Was it legal?
The yellow bag
Elisabeth sends an email to the Norwegian Directorate for Children and Families (Bufdir), which has an archive of information about children who have been adopted to Norway.
To her great surprise, there are no papers on her adoption. The Adoption Forum cannot help with information either. But she finds a folder at the state administrator in Agder.
You can read the first part of Elisabeth's search for answers here:
Read the first part of Elisabeth's story here.
Abandoned on a staircase?
Elisabeth found the name of her biological mother, Feroza Begum. In a short sentence, it is stated that Feroza gave away her daughter because her husband had died and she could not support the child. Is this true?
Wasn't she abandoned on a staircase outside an orphanage, as her adoptive mother had learned? And is there a mother out there? Elisabeth couldn't settle down with all the unanswered questions.
She is determined to find out the truth.
– For me, it is important to find out if I was adopted legally. If I was taken from my mother against her will.
Elisabeth Fjalsett
The only option is to travel to Bangladesh on her own, but that would cost her all the savings she and her husband have saved.
In addition, it is stated on Bufdir's website that:
"From experience, it is unfortunately very difficult to search for origins in Bangladesh. There are generally no archives that are operational, and no central authority that prioritizes such searches. "
But Elisabeth is a determined woman. She has been mulling over the questions for far too long already. Now she needs answers. So she and her husband Henrik decide to go to Dhaka, the capital of Bangladesh.
– Nothing is impossible. You just have to believe in what you're doing, and not rely on anyone but yourself.
Elisabeth Fjalsett
– Welcome home!
Elisabeth and her husband Henrik arrive in Dhaka knowing that the odds are not in their favor. The city has over 17 million inhabitants. In addition, they will try to find a woman who has one of the most common names in all of Asia, "Begum", which means "Mrs."
But Elisabeth is a lady who makes things happen.
On the first day, she and her husband go into the office of the "Ministry of Foreign Affairs." There, she is welcomed "home," and the minister says he will assist Elisabeth as best he can.
Elisabeth is asked to meet at the Ministry of Welfare office the next morning. When she gets there, five or six employees immediately start looking for Elisabeth's file.
They find a list of names, and number 100 on the list is "Moushimi." That's Elisabeth's birth name. Case number 442.
– It took ten minutes, then they came up from the archive with a complete folder.
In the folder, Elisabeth finds the answers she has been looking for.
Documents describing her biological family and their entire history, and why she was adopted. There are also pictures and information about her Norwegian adoptive family in the folder.
– Everything was in it. Even where my mother lived. And the papers have been there for 49 years.
Norwegian archive
The employees give Elisabeth the list of names, and she immediately sees that these are the names of others who have been adopted from Bangladesh to Norway.
It turns out that the authorities have files on 107 children who were adopted to Norway between 1974 and 1980.
Elisabeth finds it strange that it was so easy for her to find this archive, and she thinks that there are certainly many adoptees in Norway who wonder if their names are on the list.
Child bride
With the information in Elisabeth's file, staff immediately begin searching for her mother, Feroza Begum. While they make phone calls, Elisabeth is able to translate what is written about her mother's life.
– It was a relief to find the folder, but also sad to read it. I wish I had known this earlier.
Her mother Feroza was an orphan, and at the age of 12 she was married off to a man aged 41. Shortly afterwards, her grandparents, who were her only family, died.
It's not long before Feroza's husband is shot and killed. She is then 13 years old and heavily pregnant with Elisabeth.
The husband's family does not want to take care of Feroza and the child, so they have to survive on the streets.
After three months, her husband's family accompanies Feroza to the authorities, where Elisabeth is handed over to the authorities.
13-year-old Feroza has no choice.
The employees at the Minister of Welfare are very eager to help Elisabeth find her mother. But it doesn't take long before they tell Elisabeth that Feroza is unfortunately dead.
– I was sad. I thought, now I've come all the way to Bangladesh, and then she's dead? I cried my way through that night.
But the next morning Elisabeth's phone rings.
It's a text message from one of the employees at the social services office. It says: "Good news. Your mother is alive."
Feroza Begum lives in the village of Madaripur, seventy kilometers outside Dhaka. She is 62 years old and married, but has no more children.
She was not aware that her little girl ended up in Norway.
Now the authorities have contacted her.
Her daughter is on her way to meet her.
– When I found out that my daughter was alive, I was overjoyed. The fact that she will visit me feels like a dream.
Feroza Begum
The reunion
When Elisabeth arrives at the house where her mother is waiting, there are a hundred people standing outside.
News of the visit from Norway has spread throughout the village, and now everyone will witness the reunion between mother and daughter. A dozen journalists are reporting and broadcasting live on TV.
Inside a small room, Feroza sits waiting. Her eyes widen when she sees Elisabeth.
– I immediately knew it was my mother. I have given birth to four children myself. The love you get when a newborn child is placed on your chest, it was a bit like that. I knew this was my mother. My birth mother.
Feroza doesn't want to let go of her daughter, she holds her and cries.
– Holding my only child - what it made me feel is hard to understand or explain. I couldn't believe my eyes, Feroza tells TV 2.
Feroza tells Elisabeth that she would never give her away. But she was homeless and 13 years old. She had no choice.
Mother and daughter are reunited after 49 years.
When Elisabeth was born, Feroza was completely alone and had to cut the umbilical cord herself. She suffered permanent damage to her abdomen that has made it impossible for her to have more children.
– She has longed for me, she has prayed for me and had a sorrow in her heart all her life. So there was a reason why I had to find her. She has wanted to be found.
The hunt is over.
Elisabeth is back in Norway. She is still struggling to process the trip and the meeting with her mother.
It was always the search for answers that drove Elisabeth. Now she has the answers, but she has also gained a new relationship, with a previously unknown woman on the other side of the world.
New questions arise. How will they stay in touch? What can she do to help?
MANY THOUGHTS: There has been a lot to deal with over the past two years.
The last two years have not been an easy journey for Elisabeth. And she is not sure if it is something she would recommend to others. She herself feels that she is a different person today, and she is not sure how well she would have coped with everything if her husband Henrik had not supported her all the way.
– I'm pretty strong mentally, and I have an extremely strong family around me. I need that now.
Elisabeth has received a lot of important support from her daughter Pernille and the rest of her family.