Do not use Hope Adoption Agency

13 January 2009

WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 13, 2010

Do not use Hope Adoption Agency

I typically keep some of the negative parts of dealing with our agency off my blog, as we have always wanted to remain in good standing and be considerate of our agency director. Well, after today…. That’s all being thrown out the window. The truth needs to be told.

After repeated attempts to reach our adoption agency we finally received a call. It was our agency director Shimeliss Demissie. He basically started the conversation by telling me that we are not being very patient and that he feels like he should not work on our case anymore. He said that we do not understand everything that goes on with Ethiopian adoption and that he never referred our kids to us. That it is our fault for using AWOP in the beginning and not doing our homework. He continued to go on about how he is done with our case and how he can no longer help us.

I was floored. When I was allowed to speak- (he tends to take over the conversation), I asked if he was serious…. And if he is – then we would like to see our money back since we are in the same place now as we were two years ago. This was the point where he inappropriately and very unprofessionally started yelling at me. Truthfully I couldn’t understand a word he was saying, as his Ethiopian accent was getting in the way. When I calmly mentioned taking legal action to get our money he welcomed it, saying that he has spent many hours on the phone and sending emails about/for our case. To the tune of $6000 worth?

The phone conversation ended in him basically hanging up on me and telling me he needed to pick up his children from school and that he could no longer help us.

So basically…. To sum things up… our agency director just told us to take a hike because we are being “impatient”. HELLO!Welcome to the world of dealing with prospective adoptive parents, Shimeliss Demissie! We have been nothing but patient! For TWO YEARS! We have always been polite, considerate, and understanding of the situation and of our cases. We have given Shimeliss the benefit of the doubt in almost all circumstances and this is how he handles us. But that isn’t even the point. We are paying him for a service that he is obviously unable to perform. Our “lack of patience” has nothing to do with the fact that he has not been able to make any progress in the adoption of two girls from Ethiopia.

This is unacceptable.

Never in a million years, did we think that we would be in this position when we answered the call to adopt. I never thought that this journey we have been on would become so muddy and unclear. We are going to pursue every avenue to make sure this doesn’t happen to another innocent family. Not only has our money been taken, our hearts are broken. Our families, our church and our community have been taken advantage of and it is not fair.

We are overwhelmed, cried out, and tired. We want justice to be served and we want closure for the girls. They have been through enough in their short lives. If this is truly the end for us and M and G we will never ever stop praying for their lives. Please pray with us and for us as we navigate the next few days and figure out what to do next.

POSTED BY BECKY AT 6:30 AM

7 COMMENTS:

Melinda said...

So sorry to see how this has ended. I found your blog back in 2008 because we were adopting an older girl at the same time. That is so sad that not only are these girls affected by this, but your family and I am sure many more. I pray that you find some kind of peace and that justice is served. I am sure this unfortunetly isn't the first time this has happened with Hope and unless something is done, won't be the last. Praying for your family!

JANUARY 13, 2010 7:03 AM

Julie said...

Becky - I don't know what to say except to offer up my continued prayers - for a miracle and for healing your wounded hearts. It is sad to hear about what has happened at Hope because it isn't just a business, it is the lives of children and families that are forever affected. Have you explored private avenues w/ an attorney in Ethiopia or anything? If we can do anything to help, please let us know. We have some contacts in ET that work in orphan care (not adoption but they might know someone).

JANUARY 13, 2010 8:00 AM

emily said...

Heartbreaking! It saddens me the number of families like yours hurt by unethical practices, I too wish I had done more research, but you can't stop your heart from falling in love you know???

So sorry- praying for resolution somehow in this case.

JANUARY 13, 2010 8:54 AM

Sarah and Jeremy said...

I am so sorry that this has happened to these 2 little girls and your family. How heartbreaking for them and for you. I can't even imagine how difficult this must be for you and how heartbroken the girls are going to feel or what they will be told. I pray that somehow this situation can be resolved in the best way possible. I will be praying for a miracle that M and G will still be able to come home to you and if it is not possible for them to, I pray that all of your hearts will be healed. Is there any way that you can switch to a different agency and still adopt the girls? I am just so very sorry!

JANUARY 13, 2010 12:13 PM

Kristine said...

I am so sorry for your family and the girls! I pray some miracle for you.

JANUARY 13, 2010 12:36 PM

Paula said...

I am so sad for you and your family... unfortunately I know several other families in your exact situation, right down to the "I never referred those kids to you." Awful for everyone. I will be praying that somehow this situation is resolved for you and all of the other affected families.

JANUARY 13, 2010 2:25 PM

Joy said...

Becky - I don't know if you remember me, but we were with Hope at the same time as you and we both got the Shaohannah's Hope grants around the same time. We too had a nightmare experience with Hope. My husband finally spoke with Shimeliss and he finally told us he would send us our $ back. I would suggest having your husband call. Some people are lucky with Hope (especially at the beginning) and get their babies/children, others go on for months and years "waiting for paperwork" on the kids. When we left Hope, we received several emails from people "stuck" or completely unhappy, but who were not speaking up. I hope you have saved emails. We are happy to help back you in any way.

The sad thing is that when you are with an agency like that you begin to believe it is normal to have several court dates or have missing paperwork. But it is NOT! At my agency, there is NO ONE who has not brought their kids home and 90% pass court on the first try - the most court dates I have heard of anyone ever having at our agency is 2. They only refer 100% paper ready kids to 100% paper ready families at Adoption Avenues - so the process is smooth and quick. YWAM is also great and has waiting children/babies. I am so sorry -this just brought back all of the pain and frustration we went through with them. Cast your burdens on Him! I know it doesn't seem possible, but the Lord has just the perfect children for your family and this trial will only make the day you bring your children home that much sweeter.

JANUARY 13, 2010 3:23 PM

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