“Adopted people: right to security!”

A few months ago, at the request of the government, the Joustra Committee presented its report on adoption from abroad. In a hard-hitting judgment on the Dutch adoption culture and the role of the government in it, there is talk of 'serious abuses'. The conclusion: the adoption of children from abroad must stop for the time being. Minister Dekker (Legal Protection) then announced that the adoption of foreign children had to be suspended immediately. As a result, 450 current adoption files will not be completed.

WAGENINGEN- A group of adoptive parents opposes the adoption freeze. This decision also provokes a lot of resistance from many adoptees. Here is the reaction of Nangi (38) from Wageningen. She explains: “As a very small girl from Sri Lanka, I was adopted in 1986 by a Wageningen couple, who raised me very lovingly. I am so very happy with that! That feeling is completely mutual! My adoption process went very well. I know who my biological parents are. I met them and I heard why I was adopted. My biological father, an abusive alcoholic, forced my mother to relinquish me because I have physical and mental limitations. My father saw me as a failure. That was very difficult for me to hear, but it also gave me peace and security. Today's knowledge of adoption is very different from what it was thirty or forty years ago. When I heard that Minister Sander Dekker apologized for denying the mistakes, I was happy. I sincerely hope that there will be a DNA bank as a possibility that adopted children and biological parents can find each other. The world of little children is small. It consists of family, relatives and friends. Nice and clear. But once they hit puberty, the shutters open. The children discover that there is more, they want to get to know the world, their world. They want to know what their own history is and where they come from. But for the adopted children, the shutters do not open, adoptive parents cannot open the doors. They feel trapped. The government can open the door by setting up a DNA bank.” Nangi continues: “I think stopping adoption is going too far. What happened in the past should never be the reason to hinder a child's future.” Nangi points to Ranjith Postma, a good friend of hers: “Ranjith is a good author, he has also been adopted. He immerses himself in stories of adopted people and adoptive parents. He interviews and writes about it. Ranjith gives them a stage to share their story. Because his stories are so well liked, he has decided to write a book. It's about five adopted women, all of whom have the same grief, but have found a way to live with it. In this way he also helped and supported me, gave me the strength to dare to speak about it. Ranjith told me a story about a couple, who adopted a child last year. They explained to him that they had adopted a child through an open procedure.” An open procedure is the connection of the triangle: child, biological parents and adoptive parents.

“When I heard that, I was amazed. That's another way to do it. I had thought of that, but didn't know it existed. I heard and read a while ago that there was a petition to keep adoption going. I'm glad to read that I'm not the only one who thinks this way. I regret that adoptees, who have good experiences, and their adoptive parents are not heard, are even ignored. Just because we think differently about adoption doesn't mean we don't want to see that mistakes have been made. We are very well aware of that. I understand that because of the many bad experiences there is not much confidence anymore. But I still ask to be open to the stories and emotions that we have. Trust that we do this with good intentions. Let's not sit with our arms folded, but get up and work on the future. Don't dwell on the past. A lot will have to change. Admitting mistakes is the beginning. By comparing errors and improvements, it is possible to see what can be improved. Make it public so we can track it. In this way we gain more trust in each other, because that is what we lack at the moment”.

“Adoption requires optimal transparency”

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