Finally, Linn has got the answer: Found mother and brother after 35 years

Suddenly he appeared on the screen. Linn's brother, who had been in despair when she had been adopted 35 years earlier. And soon she would also be talking to her biological mother.

Linn spent much of her childhood thinking about where she really came from. She had several siblings who were also adopted, but the desire to seek out her roots she did not share with them.

- I have had a great need to know my background, and my adoptive parents have always supported me in that, says 37-year-old Linn Sjöbäck from Kållered in Sweden.

She was adopted from Sri Lanka in 1985 when she was just 14 months old. Her biological mother was involved in the transfer to the adoptive family.

- There were real documents and case files. When I got the chance to read them, I was relieved that everything had gone right. I was a little uneasy after all the writing about kidnapped children in the 80s.

But Linn wanted to know more and maybe even meet her biological mother. With all the information she already had, she thought it would be easy.

- I was extremely malnourished and weak when I came to Sweden. I could neither walk nor sit upright. It made me curious to know how my life had been until then.

However, it was not until 2008 that she really kicked off the investigation.

- I had just given birth to my first daughter and it gave me blood on my teeth.

Linn applied to participate in the TV show "Sporløs", but there were many about the bid, and she was never selected.

- I realized that I had to go to Sri Lanka myself, says Linn and adds:

- It is important for me to say that I have always felt enormously grateful. I'm lucky because I came to Sweden and had such an amazing family. It's by no means a pity for me.

May not be lucia break

Racism was not something she experienced as a problem during her upbringing, although today she can well see that it was completely different times. She was the only one in the class with a dark skin color.

- I was never allowed to be a Lucia bride. Instead, my teacher wanted me to be gingerbread when there were Christmas shows. I did not like my dark hair at the time, but I was in the shows because I loved to perform.

Linn especially liked to dance and sing. That led to her writing a song for her biological mother six years ago and recording it in a professional studio.

- I posted the music on social media along with a slide show with pictures that I had of my mother and I got a lot of sweet reactions.

She understood that it was time to take seriously her thoughts on seeking out her family - or at least trying to obtain more information from home. It was not the easiest thing just to leave, since she now had her own family to take care of.

- In the fall of 2020, I became a member of a Facebook group for adoptees from Sri Lanka and India. There I wrote a post and asked if anyone could help me find my biological family. The response was huge. I was bombarded with answers, laughs Linn.

Through the Facebook group, she somehow also got a different kind of family who knew exactly what she was feeling and looking for. They knew her country of birth and had their own experiences looking for their roots.

Two siblings

Among other things, Linn got in touch with Buddhini, an interpreter and local guide, who had also worked on the TV program "Sporløs". With his help, she got hold of her birth certificate, which stated that she had two biological siblings, and a name for her biological father could also be obtained.

Now she knew enough to be able to continue her hunt.

- Soon I got in touch with the association Sri Lanka Reunited and they first found two of my aunts who had a phone number for my biological big brother. Unfortunately, they had broken contact with my mother, so that track I had to pursue later.

But with the phone number, everything went faster than Linn had dared hope. Suddenly, she was sitting in the middle of a video conversation with her brother and an interpreter.

- When my brother, Sarath, appeared on the screen, it was quite obvious. I thought we looked a lot like each other.

She asked lots of questions and quickly got the feeling that it was the most important phone call of her life. It seemed strange that it was perfectly natural to talk to someone with whom she shared neither language nor culture.

- Sarath was six years old when I was given away, so he clearly remembers me, and he was crushed when I disappeared. He had cared for me when my mother was working and it was a big responsibility for a six year old. No wonder he got incredibly upset when I was suddenly not there anymore.

It was also hard for Sarath that he was suddenly left alone when his two younger sisters were adopted away. The father was both an alcoholic and violent.

- He has a lot of luggage from that time. But at the same time he is happy that I got rid of it, because as he said to me: "As a girl you had not managed".

Asked for reunion

The more gratifying news was that Sarath shared Linn's interest in music and that he had children the same age as hers. He also said that he had often visited the Buddhist temple, where he had prayed that one day he would be reunited with his sisters.

It was he who put Linn in touch with their common mother.

- "I can go and talk to her first", he said to me, and that's how it turned out to be a video conversation with her.

"Hello, are you my daughter?" were the first words from Linn's biological mother to her daughter.

- And then she started crying and saying "sorry, sorry". She explained to me that she felt compelled to adopt me in order to save me from her husband. Save my life. "Your father was a bad man," she said.

Linn was relieved to hear why she had been given away. Through countless conversations since then, she has gained an even greater understanding of what her brother grew up with.

- It has been a trauma for him. He has cried many tears. It's a terrible fate, but today he has a good life with his family. He works as a Marine.

Linn is happy that she has found a brother who is similar to her and who has been able to tell about her first year of life.

- Sarath told me I used to stick my tongue out at him. There is also photo evidence, she laughs.

Will visit family

Today, she also has contact with her brother's two children, and they write to her regularly.

- I'm a bit like a role model for them, and they send incredibly sweet messages with hearts and flowers.

Linn has also had regular contact with her biological mother. She had remarried to a Dutchman and got a good economy. Today, she lives in a fine home that she inherited when her husband died.

- She has four dogs and two cats in her big house. This is probably why there has been a crunch in the relationship with the rest of the family. They might think she should share more of her wealth.

Linn plans to visit them all, but the corona epidemic has so far delayed their first meeting. She also hopes to make contact with her sister, who was adopted to the Netherlands. And even with his biological father.

In the meantime, she is trying to digest the fact that in a short time she has had an extended family added to her already large family in Sweden. She has three children aged 4-13 years, who are also looking forward to meeting the new family members.

- It is a completely new future that awaits us, Linn smiles.

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