As an adoptive mother you are not only a parent, but often also a care provider. That is something Hoda Hamdaoui did not realize beforehand.
Hoda Hamdaoui (49) knew from an early age that she wanted to adopt a child. Together with her mother she was a big fan of the TV program Spoorloos. Crying on the couch, she saw how presenter Derk Bolt flew around the world to unite adopted children with often poverty-stricken biological parents. She decided that she also wanted to adopt a child later.
About thirty years later the time had come, and baby Damir – Arabic for 'conscience' – came into her life. She tells her story in the recently published book De Goede Mama (Pluim Publishers), in which women with a migration background talk about motherhood. She tells how she experienced the first years as a single adoptive mother. It was not an easy time. Damir was a sweet but laborious child who needed a lot of care.
After the interview with the Kantteken, she sends a few photos of her adopted son. He is now a big toddler, with sensitive eyes and a beautiful head of dark hair. Hamdaoui contributed to the book, she says, because she thinks it is important that women of color are also present in literature about motherhood. They are now barely represented. But actually, she says, her story is not about origins at all. Because motherhood is universal and so is adopting a child.
How did Damir come into your life?
