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Mother’s shock as she discovers woman she raised is not her daughter

A woman who gave her newborn baby to a group of Catholic nuns for safekeeping in the 1960s has discovered that they handed her back the wrong child.

Helen Maguire (71) made the shock discovery last year when DNA tests revealed Christine Skipsey (52), the girl she had brought up as her own, was not her biological daughter.

She subsequently found out the child she gave birth to, and briefly left in the care of St Patrick’s Guild, had been adopted by a married couple. It is unclear if the switching of the babies was a mistake or deliberate.

The former adoption society, which was run by the Religious Sisters of Charity, has been mired in scandal over revelations many births were falsely registered to facilitate illegal adoptions.

But Ms Maguire’s experience suggests irregularities at St Patrick’s Guild and similar institutions may also have included the swapping of babies.

Since getting the DNA results, both women have been on a journey to get answers, with Helen hoping to meet her birth daughter — and Christine seeking to find out who she really is.

For the first 51 years of her life, the mother-of-two never for a moment questioned her own identity. But last summer, after publicity about the illegal adoption scandal in Ireland, she and the woman she always knew as “mum”, Helen Maguire, decided to get DNA tests.

Helen did not give up her child for adoption, but placed her for six weeks with the now infamous St Patrick’s Guild, which ran an adoption society at Temple Hill in Blackrock, Co Dublin, until the 1980s.

Just over half-a-century later, amid revelations of illegal adoptions and irregularities with birth registrations at St Patrick’s, questions arose in Helen’s mind. She had dark hair while Christine had blonde hair and blue eyes.

They ordered a DNA test kit online. The results came back a few days later and revealed with 99.9pc certainty that Helen was not Christine’s mother.

“I felt very lonely,” Christine said.

“I honestly never thought it would come back like that.”

For Helen, the outcome was equally devastating. “I just couldn’t believe it,” she said.

For them, the results point to only one possible explanation — that Helen was given the wrong baby by the nuns who ran St Patrick’s when she went to collect Christine all those years ago.

Since getting the DNA results last July, both women have been on a journey to get to the truth, with Helen determined to find the daughter she gave birth to and Christine seeking to find out who she really is.

“Christine will always be my daughter as far as I am concerned. She is still my baby and I love Christine to bits,” said Helen.

Christine now lives in Hertfordshire, north of London, with her husband and works as a secretary in an estate agency. Before the DNA test, Christine never once doubted that Helen was her mother. “Even when mum mentioned it last July, I just laughed,” she said.

They got in contact with Tusla, which has had the records from St Patrick’s Guild since 2016, and sought the assistance of Dublin law firm, Coleman Legal Partners, which has several clients affected by the St Patrick’s Guild scandal. Christine has since received information indicating where she was born and her real date of birth.

Questions were submitted to the Religious Sisters of Charity but it was unable to provide a response before publication.

A Tale of A Shadowed Woman by Bram Paling

Bram’s mother was born in Bangladesh just after a civil war. She was later adopted by a Dutch couple. However, she knew her biological parents didn’t want to get rid of her. She tried to find them, and after 40 years a DNA test provided by a Dutch-Bangladeshi adoptee organization proved to be successful. Read this story about a woman looking for her biological family in Bangladesh…

Japan's adoption rules changed to allow older kids' ties to biological parents to be severed

The Diet on Friday passed a revision to increase the upper age limit at which a child can be adopted under a special system that allows ties to their biological parents to be severed.

Formerly, children’s ties to their biological parents could only be cut before the age of 6, but under the revised law children 14 and younger are now eligible.

The special adoption program is aimed at providing a stable, nurturing environment for children who cannot be raised by their biological parents because of economic difficulties or a history of abuse in the home.

Unlike regular adoptions where legal connections with biological parents are retained, the special program allows the children to be legally registered to their adoptive parents, with the previous ties erased.

Social Services missing its own target to put kids on adoption list

"For kids, time is of the essence," warned Saskatchewan's provincial auditor after finding that few permanent wards get on the adoption registry within 120 days

It’s taking longer for the Ministry of Social Services to get its permanent wards onto the adoption list, and Saskatchewan’s provincial auditor worries it could hurt kids’ chances of finding a new family.

Provincial Auditor Judy Ferguson reviewed how well the ministry was meeting three outstanding recommendations from her 2013 report.

She announced on Thursday that two had been met, but the ministry was missing its own target for placing 85 per cent of kids on an adoption registry within 120 days of their becoming permanent wards.

In fact, she found “slippage” from the year before. In 2016-17, the ministry met the 120-day goal in 17 per cent of cases. In 2017-18, it managed just nine per cent of the time.

“Delays in doing that, placing a child on an adoption list, may negatively affect the likelihood of a child having a permanent home, and that is particularly true for older children,” she told reporters Thursday.

“For kids, time is of the essence.”

She acknowledged that the ministry had set a “pretty aggressive” target, and also pointed to some positive trends. Notably, there were 128 fewer permanent wards at the end of last year, compared to during her last audit in 2012. As of December 2018, there were 465 kids in that position.

Despite the progress elsewhere, Ferguson stressed that the missed target shows the ministry has “more work to do.”

NDP Social Services critic Nicole Rancourt agreed. She said the delays can create uncertainty, both for kids and for foster families.

“We want to ensure that these children have permanent placements and homes, so that they are feeling comfortable and familiar with their home environments,” she said.

“The attachment is so important with the caregiver and the child. And when you have that uncertainty, it’s really hard for them to build that attachment, which is huge for children’s development.”

She criticized the ministry for “failing their own standards.”

The Ministry of Social Services responded that it will look at a policy to push back the targets in certain cases. It noted in a statement to the Leader-Post that the cases it deals with are often complex, and pointed to a need for working with extended family. It said that complexity is often the reason for delay.

“Over recent years, we have placed significant focus on how we can strengthen families to keep them together safely, and when that is not possible, exploring every avenue to place children and youth requiring out-of-home care with extended family,” said the statement.

It said pushing back the deadline will be helpful when extended family members come forward and offer to care for a child.

“This will allow the required time it takes to work with the family to do all required assessments without being outside existing policy,” the statement said.

But the ministry also committed to engaging with staff to improve compliance, and ensure that there is proper documentation for when adoption isn’t a long-term goal. It said both of those two measures will be implemented by the 2020-21 fiscal year.

Ferguson also noted that the ministry has succeeded in prioritizing children under the age of five, and has hired additional staff to help complete assessments.

Her look at the adoption target was just one of 32 follow-up audits she conducted in Volume 1 of her 2019 report, to assess how the government was keeping up with her past recommendations.

She found that government agencies fully implemented more than half. In her view, that’s pretty good compared to other provinces. But it’s a bit slower than she has seen in the past. She believes it might have something to do with resource constraints.

“When we talk to agencies, what they tell us is that they remain committed to implementing those recommendations,” she said. “But they actually cite that they’ve got fiscal pressures, and they’ve got their priorities that are slowing that pace of improvements.”

Enfants “ abandonnés ” : le procès des parents à Tours

"Abandoned" children: the parents' trial in Tours

A couple was sentenced to twelve and ten months in prison suspended for evading their parental obligations.
The children, they remain placed. Courts Correctional Court Of the trial, we would like to retain only the testimony of the grandmother.
Full of kindness and tenderness. This old lady on whose shoulders now rests the fate of four of her grandchildren,
aged 3 to 15 years, placed at home since November to allow them to escape the idleness of his daughter and his companion.
A message on the debates as a stark contrast to the clumsy explanations of parents. Angélique and Denis, 39 and 36 years old, appeared Monday in the Tours Criminal Court for "subtraction from their parental obligations".
The judicial closure of a situation that has become critical. Social services denounce unhealthy family housing, the school signals problems of personal hygiene and disorders of the blossoming.
On the bench of defendants, two stoic parents face the unpacking of this family closed.

"I know everything is serious. I should have questioned myself ... "She, five children born of three unions," happy when she is pregnant
but later exceeded "; looking for a job, described as an alcoholic, sometimes violent and a gamer. A painting in the Zola sketched by the
story of cockroach traps posed by the father-in-law in the house or that of bowls of water boiled twice a week "for the children's bath". And then, there is the abandonment of responsibilities. The car trips of the father-in-law (without a license), a child in the trunk, the
list of long races like the bottles of alcohol preferred to the feeding of the children.
Questioned during two hours of hearing, the couple reiterated their apologies. "I hurt my children, I would not care for all my life ...
I know everything is serious, I should have questioned earlier ...", sobs the mother. The father-in-law, father of the last child, little
talkative, fits in the remorse formulated by his companion. No more. A few minutes earlier, it is on his person that the charges rain. Those transcribed in the procedure that say a lot about the habits
taken by Denis. The beers uncapped in the morning, online parties spent knocking out zombies in front of children. Then the flowery words,
the sexual vocabulary. Psychological and physical undermining too. Since May, the juvenile judge has banned for six months any contact between the couple and children.
"Since they are at their grandmother's, they find living conditions calmed," says the president of the court, Catherine Batonneau.
A way to remember that their only anxiety is currently having a day to return to live with their parents. Time will do its job, as suggested by Christophe Georges. In his argument, the defense counsel invites the court to consider the "hope"
born of the "recent" awareness of the couple.

"The objective is very clearly to limit the breakage, not to demonstrate that they are determined to assume their
parental authority," accuses the prosecutor. A stance followed by the court, which sentenced parents to ten and twelve months suspended sentence.

French:

Un couple a été condamné à douze et dix mois de prison avec sursis pour soustraction à leurs obligations parentales.

Les enfants, eux, restent placés.
 

Tribunal correctionnel de Tours Du procès, on aimerait ne retenir que le témoignage de la grand-mère. Plein de bienveillance et de tendresse. Cette vieille dame sur les épaules de laquelle repose désormais le sort de quatre de ses petits-enfants, âgés de 3 à 15 ans, placés chez elle depuis novembre pour leur permettre d’échapper à l’oisiveté de sa fille et de son compagnon. Un message posé sur les débats comme un contraste saisissant avec les explications maladroites des parents.

Angélique et Denis, 39 et 36 ans, comparaissaient lundi devant le tribunal correctionnel de Tours pour « soustraction à leurs obligations parentales ». La clôture judiciaire d’une situation devenue critique.
Les services sociaux dénoncent un logement familial insalubre, l’école signale des problèmes d’hygiène corporelle et des troubles de l’épanouissement. Sur le banc des prévenus, deux parents stoïques face au déballage de ce huis clos familial.
“ Je sais que tout est grave. J’aurais dû me remettre en question… ” Elle, cinq enfants nés de trois unions, « heureuse lorsqu’elle est enceinte mais dépassée ensuite » ; lui en recherche d’emploi, décrit comme alcoolique, parfois violent et gamer assidu. Un tableau à la Zola esquissé par le récit des pièges à cafards posés par le beau-père dans la maison ou celui des gamelles d’eau bouillies deux fois par semaine « pour le bain des petits ».
Et puis, il y a l’abandon des responsabilités. Les trajets en voiture du beau-père (sans permis), un enfant dans le coffre, la liste des courses longue comme les bouteilles d’alcool préférées à l’alimentation des enfants.
Interrogé le long de deux heures d’audience, le couple a réitéré ses excuses. « J’ai fait du mal à mes enfants, je m’en voudrais toute ma vie… Je sais que tout est grave, j’aurais dû me remettre en question plus tôt… », sanglote la maman. Le beau-père, père du dernier enfant, peu bavard, s’inscrit dans les remords formulés par sa compagne. Pas plus.
Quelques minutes plus tôt, c’est sur sa personne que les accusations pleuvent. Celles retranscrites dans la procédure qui en disent long sur les habitudes prises par Denis. Les bières décapsulées dès le matin, les parties en ligne passées à dégommer des zombies devant les enfants. Puis les mots fleuris, le vocabulaire sexuel. La sape psychologique, physique aussi.
Depuis mai, le juge des enfants a interdit pour six mois tout contact entre le couple et les enfants. « Depuis qu’ils sont chez leur grand-mère, ils retrouvent des conditions de vie apaisées », lit la présidente du tribunal, Catherine Batonneau. Une manière de rappeler que leur seule angoisse est actuellement d’avoir un jour à retourner vivre avec leurs parents.
Le temps fera son travail, comme le suggère Me Christophe Georges. Dans sa plaidoirie, l’avocat de la défense invite le tribunal à considérer « l’espoir »« de la prise de conscience » – récente – du couple.
« L’objectif est très clairement de limiter la casse, pas de démontrer qu’ils sont déterminés à assumer leur autorité parentale », accuse le procureur de la République.
Une posture suivie par le tribunal, qui condamne les parents à dix et douze mois de prison avec sursis.

'Forced to sleep in shipping container': Perth girl claims adoptive parents abused her

A young girl claims she was beaten, abused and made to sleep in a shipping container for at least four months by her adoptive parents, a court has heard.

The Perth couple at the centre of the claims appeared in the WA District Court on Thursday, pleading not guilty to charges including deprivation of liberty and having control and care of a child and engaging in conduct that could result in the child’s suffering.

The girl, who cannot be identified for legal reasons, was adopted from the Phillipines by the couple after suffering an abusive childhood at the hands of her biological father and stepmother.

The couple had three biological children of their own and another adopted daughter, aged 12, when the young girl was taken into the family’s Busselton home.

The court heard the alleged victim had trouble adapting to her new life, and her behaviour took a turn for the worse when the family moved from their home in the South West to a property in Mundijong.

Belangengroep Indiaas Geadopteerden Nederland: Toelichting ondertekening gezamenlijk plan UAI.

Toelichting ondertekening gezamenlijk plan UAI.

Waarom heeft Belangengroep Indiaas Geadopteerden Nederland het plan van UAI getekend?

We zijn het allemaal eens over het feit dat er goede passende nazorg moet komen, dat dossiers kosteloos opgevraagd moeten kunnen worden en dat er dan ook hulp is om dossiers te "lezen" net als DNA uitslagen en dat geadopteerden een vergoeding in de vorm van een persoonlijk budget moeten krijgen. Graag wil ik nogmaals benadrukken waarom Belangengroep Indiaas Geadopteerden Nederland het plan van UAI ondertekend.

In het plan staat namelijk dat we graag een persoonlijke vergoeding voor de geadopteerde zien zodat zij zelf kunnen kiezen waaraan ze dit uitgeven. Als zij behoefte hebben om een OCI, therapie, zoektocht of rootsreis etc. te bekostigen moet dit mogelijk zijn.

Daarnaast pleiten we voor subsidiëring van de belangenorganisaties in de landen van herkomst. Waarom? Zij hebben de kennis, expertise, ervaring én resultaten. Het netwerk is er al waarom hier geen gebruik van maken en zelf het wiel uit willen vinden? Dit kost téveel tijd en téveel geld, dat hebben en krijgen we nu eenmaal niet

Het is een ontzettend ambitieus en mooi idee om een keuze te hebben in een organisatie die zoekt in India maar totaal niet realistisch natuurlijk. We willen benadrukken dat het altijd vrij staat om zelf te zoeken. Als jijzelf, je detective, advocaat of je social worker niet slaagt, is er voor Indiaas geadopteerden namelijk maar één organisatie die zoekt in India en dat is ARC/ACT. De overheid gaat namelijk niet elk willekeurige detective of social worker in India "sponsoren" en ook niet alle geadopteerden van nederland zo'n X-groot bedrag geven waarvan je een zoektocht van kan voltooien. Stel dat de overheid zegt dat geadopteerden een persoonlijk budget krijgt voor zoektochten dan nemen ze waarschijnlijk de gemiddelde prijs van een zoektocht van elk land en kom je uit op bijv. €1000. Hier kun je over het algemeen, uitzonderingen daar gelaten, niet van zoeken in India. Daarentegen als de organisaties gesubsidieerd worden, worden zoektochten voor een fatsoenlijke prijs mogelijk.

ACT is gevestigd in Nederland, heeft aantoonbaar; de feiten, cijfers + (beste) resultaten en is dus ook meteen ons beste kans. Zijn wij die bereid te pakken? JA!!

Één van de andere hoofdredenen om het plan van UAI te tekenen is het feit dat, als de subsidiëring van belangenorganisaties in de landen van herkomst doorgaat, niet alleen Indiaas geadopteerden hierbij gebaat zijn maar ook geadopteerden uit andere landen. Het gaat hier om het gezamenlijk belang. Wij kunnen het namelijk niet verantwoorden om het niet te tekenen gezien het feit dat Indiaas geadopteerden, naar ons inzien, niks te verliezen hebben.

We hebben voor deze beslissing al onze belangen, persoonlijke kwesties/conflicten, vooroordelen etc. aan de kant gezet om deze weloverwogen te kunnen nemen, kijkend naar de toekomst, wat er nodig is maar ook wat daadwerkelijk realistisch en haalbaar is.

Met vriendelijke groet,

Savida Das
Nandita Steinmann
Anice Das

Expanding foster care changing Ethiopian communities

Ethiopia (MNN) — Bethany Christian Services’ successful foster care program in Ethiopia is growing. Currently, they serve in five cities and have a goal to expand their efforts to five more cities and place 1,000 children in loving, Christian homes by the end of 2023.

Their foster-to-adopt program began in 2010 and has already placed nearly 400 children into local homes.

Foster-to-Adopt in Ethiopia

“We basically believe that every child should be raised in a family and they need a family to belong to. The idea of taking care of children in childcare institutions has been there for a long time. It was one of the widely practiced form[s] of care for many years,” Bethany’s Sebilu Bodja says.

According to UNICEF, there are about 4.6 million orphaned or half-orphaned children in the nation. Children are often abandoned by their parents because they can’t afford to raise them. Other times, parents have passed away from diseases or the children have run away from home. Because of this, orphanages are packed and children receive little attention.

When Pain and Loss is Too Much

Behind the cheeky smile lies much hurt, sadness and vulnerability. Although I’m all grown up now, it doesn’t mean my pain has ever gone away!

I’m not usually one to vent my frustration and hurt on social media but here I go!! I am sick of living a life of pain and loss. Over the past few years, I’ve spent so much of my time in mental health facilities, I can’t even count them all. Every time I think I’m getting better, something shit brings me back down. You would think being in a mental health facility would enable you the care and support you need. I can tell you – it’s far from it!

I’m currently in a mental health ward and life feels like it has just fallen into a million pieces over 24 hours! I have disappointed my adoptive parents, affected reputations, lost friends and now feel like I’ve got to fight this battle on my own.

I’ve had several occasions where nurses come talk to me and they lecture me on my life! As an adoptee how dare they sit there and tell me everything’s going to be okay, that I am privileged and should be grateful for what I have!

I’m sure many other adoptees have had these statements said over and over again. How dare people who don’t know me lecture me about my life. They don’t know what it’s like to lose my birth family and have a million questions unanswered. So what gives them the right to be so judgemental?

Why Is The U.S. State Department Making It Harder For Orphans To Find Families?

Adoption advocates ask the courts to block a crippling new State Department policy that would harm waiting families and children.

Jacques and Emily Rancourt have the kind of family you don’t see every day. Not only are they raising seven children—five through adoption—but most of their adopted children have life-threatening congenital heart defects. The Rancourts have spent so much time in cardiac care at Children’s National Hospital in Washington D.C. that they and another couple started a charity for families of children in cardiac crisis.

“Lily can connect with these children in the hospital like no one else can,” Emily says of her 9-year-old daughter, whose remarkable story includes receiving a heart transplant at age four. “She’s using the gift she was given to the maximum. She blesses people everywhere she goes.”

This video, originally made for the American Heart Association, gives a glimpse of what Lily has overcome:

But according to Emily, their adoption of Lily and her four siblings almost didn’t happen. The Rancourts had always been interested in adopting, but when they started to research the process about ten years ago, they quickly became overwhelmed. “The process just seemed so complicated, and the cost seemed prohibitive,” Emily says. “We began to think, ‘Adoption isn’t for people like us.’”