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Adoption Of Little Girl Takes Nearly 4 Years

Nov 17, 2009 7:25 am US/Eastern
Adoption Of Little Girl Takes Nearly 4 Years
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Eileen Curran
SUGAR HILL, N.H. (WBZ) ?
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A New Hampshire family has waited a long time to adopt a baby girl; so long in fact, the baby is now nearly four years old and speaks only Spanish.

"The emotional process she's having to go through being plucked from her life as she knows it, might as well have been Mars the difference between there and here," said adoptive father Jason Kern.

When Kern and his wife Lisen began the process of adopting the infant girl they named Ali from Guatemala in 2006, they never thought it would take this long.

Chinese culture embraced by Canadian adoptive family

Chinese culture embraced by Canadian adoptive family
(Xinhua)
Updated: 2009-11-17 10:25

Evelyn raises awareness of adoption

Evelyn raises awareness of adoption

Evelyn raises awareness of adoption

Evelyn Robinson at her Christies Beach home.

EVELYN Robinson felt she had very little choice when she fell pregnant as a 19-year-old university student in Edinburgh in 1969.

Close to finishing her Arts degree, struggling to make ends meet and sharing a small two-room house, Ms Robinson was told she couldn’t raise a child alone.

So, she decided to give up her baby for adoption.

“One friend who was a medical student who went on to become a doctor actually said to me, ‘If you keep this baby it will turn into a juvenile delinquent’,” she says.

“That was very much the feeling of the time. I felt that not only could I not do it, I shouldn’t do it.”

After giving birth to a boy, Ms Robinson, who now lives in Christies Beach, discharged herself from hospital early to sit her final exams.

She eventually returned to Bermuda, an island off the east coast of the US where she grew up, found work as a teacher, married and had four children.

Giving birth to her first child with her husband, a boy, brought memories of her other son’s birth flooding back. “I was actually thinking, ‘I don’t deserve to have a child’,” she says. “It’s too good to be true that I could get to have a child of my own because I felt so guilty about everything that had happened.”

Ms Robinson moved to South Australia in 1982 and was reunited with her son Stephen Ferguson in 1991 through a Scotland-based adoption organisation. “The four children came with me to the airport and we were all lined up, all five of us,” she recalls of the reunion.

“What he said afterwards was, when he came off the plane and saw these five people all standing there, it was the first time in his life that he saw someone who looked like him.”

She now has a good relationship with Mr Ferguson, who came to live with her while studying teaching at Adelaide University in 2003.

Ms Robinson has worked as an adoption counsellor, spoken at conferences around the world and written two books, with a third to be released this month, titled Adoption Reunion: Ecstasy or Agony?.

To contact Relationship Australia’s (SA) Post-Adoption Support service call 8245 8100 or visit http://www.relationships.com.au

Dutch Parliamentary Question - Teeven - Ethiopia

2009Z21789 Vragen van het lid Teeven (VVD) aan de minister van Justitie over de Nederlandse nationaliteit van adoptiekinderen uit Ethiopië. (Ingezonden 17 november 2009) 1 Weet u dat het voor Nederlandse ouders die een kind uit Ethiopië adopteren en daarvoor officiële goedkeuring hebben verkregen van de rechtbank aldaar in de praktijk moeilijk blijkt te zijn om de Nederlandse nationaliteit voor hun adoptiekind te regelen? Zo ja, bent u van plan hier iets aan te veranderen? 2 Is het waar dat de doorlooptijd van de procedure van de Immigratie- en Naturalisatiedienst (IND) met betrekking tot de adoptie van een kind per regio aanzienlijk kan verschillen? Zo ja, bent u voornemens dit te anders te regelen om zodoende dit te beperken? 3 Bent u ervan op de hoogte dat het voor de adoptieouders niet te bevatten is dat zij in langdurige onzekerheid zitten met betrekking tot de aanvraag van de Nederlandse nationaliteit? Is het niet zo dat bij een adoptiekwestie het belang van het kind voorop dient te staan?

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Deborra-lee Furness pushes for more adoptions

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Deborra-lee Furness pushes for more adoptions

By Jessica Tapp

Posted 1 hour 49 minutes ago

 

Australia's Rudd apologizes to forced child migrants

(Photograph)
Australian Prime Minister Kevin Rudd (l.) comforts a victim after giving a national apology to the forgotten Australians and former child migrants at a ceremony in the great hall at Parliament House in Canberra on Monday.
Reuters
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Australia's Rudd apologizes to forced child migrants

Australia Prime Minister Kevin Rudd formally apologized to the thousands of institutionalized children and child migrants shipped from Britain to rebuild Australia after World War II. Many were abused.

Australian Prime Minister Kevin Rudd on Monday apologized to hundreds of thousands of children abused or neglected in institutions, including some 7,000 British children shipped to Australia after World War II. Sometimes called "the orphans of Empire," they received the formal apology after decades of campaigning for recognition. As with his government's previous apologies, many of the victims here welcomed the gesture, while others expressed a desire to see more practical steps taken to overcome their losses.

Inside Parliament House in Canberra, the nation's capital, about 900 of the former child migrants gathered in the audience to hear Mr. Rudd deliver words of contrition. The prime minister told them: "We come together today to offer our nation's apology, to say to you, the forgotten Australians, and those who were sent to our shores as children without their consent, that we are sorry. Sorry that as children you were taken from your families and placed in institutions where so often you were abused. Sorry for the physical suffering, the emotional starvation, and the cold absence of love, of tenderness, of care. Sorry for the tragedy, the absolute tragedy, of childhoods lost."

Among those listening to the apology – which followed one delivered by Mr. Rudd last year to the "Stolen Generations" of Aboriginal children forcibly removed from their families – was Mick Snell, who has bleak memories of his time in a Methodist-run children's home in Sydney.

Mr. Snell arrived in Australia under a postwar plan to empty British orphanages and repopulate the former colony with "good white stock." The children, who were shipped out from 1947-67, believed their parents were dead. In reality, Mr. Snell's unmarried mother had been forced to give him up as a baby. That was the case with many of the "orphans;" others had been placed in care by impoverished families.

Parliamentary inquiries in Britain and Australia in the past decade concluded that physical and sexual abuse were "widespread and systematic" in the institutions, particularly those run by Catholic orders such as the Christian Brothers and Sisters of Mercy. The inquiries heard that many former child migrants, now in their 60s and 70s, are still deeply traumatized.

'For my kids to understand'

For some, Rudd's apology – which was also extended to Australian children who were abused and neglected in institutions – was a step forward. Speaking before traveling to Canberra, Snell said: "All I want is for them to admit it was wrong, and for my kids to be able to understand me a bit better."

For others, the gesture represented too little, too late. "I wonder how they think making an apology can right the wrong that was done," said Jean Costello.

Ms. Costello was just seven when she was sent to an orphanage in Perth run by the Sisters of Mercy. She had left England with expectations of a country where "everyone was black and there'd be animals hopping down the street."

The reality wasn't what she had imagined. Of her new home, Costello recalls: "It was a very hard, very cold sort of environment, and you learnt very early that it was easier to toe the line than go against it. The nuns were pretty free and easy with the strap, and you didn't have to do much to merit a beating."

Coming British apology?

Redress has been slow, and piecemeal. In recent years, several Australian state governments have apologized, as has the Catholic Church. Some states have offered compensation and counseling services; in others, services have been virtually non-existent. Both Britain and Australia provided funds to help people travel back to Britain to trace their families, but the money was limited and many missed out.

Some migrants learned that their parents had tried to seek them, without success – either because their names were changed when they arrived in Australia, or because parents were told by British authorities that their children were dead or had been adopted by wealthy families.

Returning to Britain, Costello found out – too late – that both her parents had lived well into their 70s. Of those responsible for her welfare, she says: "They deprived me of ever knowing my mum and dad."

There are calls for Britain to apologize, too – and, after years of turning a deaf ear, the government recently hinted that it may follow Australia's example.

Some good intentions

Yet historical records suggest that the policy of sending children to the other side of the world stemmed at the time from good intentions. Britain believed they would fare better than in cash-starved orphanages at home. Australia, meanwhile, was desperate to rebuild its population after suffering heavy war casualties. The children were cheap to house, and a ready source of labor.

And, importantly for Australia, they were white; this was an era when Australia feared being overwhelmed by "Asian hordes" from neighboring countries.

The institutions, though, were not properly inspected, and staff were mostly untrained and poorly supervised. The official inquiries heard that funds provided by the government for the children's upkeep were sometimes used to feed staff well, while the children were given scraps.

The homes also attracted pedophiles. Many children – the exact proportion is unknown – have said they were sexually abused. Others have described miserable, lonely lives, during which birthdays and Christmases went unmarked, and they never received any affection.

Laurie Humphreys, a former migrant, says: "We're all survivors, but emotionally it's had a long-lasting effect. It has affected our relationships; many of us have been divorced, and people have turned to alcoholism. People's lives have been ruined by what's happened to them."

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HC framing new rules for international adoptions

HC framing new rules for international adoptions

2009-11-16

By: Swati Deshpande

MUMBAI: International adoptions hold a fascination for many adoption agencies across the country. For the child, it is an opportunity to get a
family's love. But in a rising number of cases, children given in for adoption abroad, are abandoned or forced to come back to India for other reasons. And when that happens, usually they have nothing to fall back on. To fill in this lacuna and to ensure a safety net for cross-border adoptions, the Bombay high court is for the first time suggesting the establishment of a National Children's Trust Fund for their rehabilitation.

Justice Dhananjay Chandrachud is in the process of finalising path-breaking guidelines on foreign adoptions and the steps that need to be taken to ensure the welfare of these children. On Friday, the judge at an in-chamber hearing in which Asha Bajpai of TISS and additional solicitor general Darius Khambatta are participating, the court considered shortlisting several key systemic changes to the procedure. The judge is of the view that children who are abandoned or forced to return to India cannot be left to chart their course through unknown territory and with no institutional help. In a radical proposal, it was suggested that $5,000 should be deposited by each foreign adopting parent/s before the adoption is finalised. The funds thus collected would then be used for supporting children who return to India.

In one case, that is still pending before the Bombay HC, Jennifer Haynes, now 27 and adopted 20 years ago by a US couple, was sent back on certain charges. She moved the high court, saying she has no identity left and nowhere to stay. In another case, a 14-year-old girl also adopted by a US family is now back after she developed psychiatric problems. The question is who would fund her treatment-Wide Horizons for Children (WHC), the adoption agency that had placed her for adoption and then flew her back in 2008 September or Indian government's Central Adoption Resources Agency which gave the permission to bring her back or the Indian Council for Social Welfare (ICSW) under whose care she is now. The Indian council wants the adoptee parents and the WHC to pay for the medical treatment.

The HC has said that proper psychiatric evaluation prior to such international adoptions is also a must.

Advocate Jamshed Mistry, who has dealt with several cases of issues cropping in foreign adoptions, said that what needs to be done immediately is to ensure that records of foreign adoptions must be scrupulously kept by the agency that facilitated it for the 60-year period as mandated by the Hague Convention to which India is a signatory. But the practice is sometimes not followed. On adoption by a foreign national, the process of naturalisation of the child ought to begin immediately.

PM responds to over 10,000 signatures on the cause of adoption

PM responds to over 10,000 signatures on the cause of adoption

‘Catalysts for Social Action’s petition to the Honorable Prime Minister of India, meets with success

Mumbai, 16th November 2009: Catalysts for Social Action (CSA), a social welfare organization dedicated to the cause of adoption and child welfare, announced the success of the petition signature campaign to the Honorable Prime Minister of India, Dr. Manmohan Singh. Mrs. Bharati Dasgupta, Managing Trustee, and Mr. Brajesh Misra, Member, CSA, got an audience with the Prime Minister on the basis of nearly 10,000 petition signatures garnered by CSA from across the nation.

The petition led by CSA, focused on the state of adoption in the country. Highlighting the various issues like lack of inter-agency coordination, restrictive processes, red tapism, poor social acceptance, illegal practices and misconceptions about the process itself, the petition placed the following requests:

ä To set up a task force headed by a Member of the Planning Commission to study the entire issue around adoption and foster care and come up with a holistic revamp of policy and laws.

Pity third world orphans, but they're not a commodity

Pity third world orphans, but they're not a commodity
DIANNE DEMPSEY
November 15, 2009
A drive to make it easier for Australians to adopt overseas is misguided.
MAGGIE Millar has a problem with Deborra-Lee Furness' work. Supported by her movie star husband, Hugh Jackman, Furness has cranked up a campaign to open up overseas adoption for Australian couples. Part of this campaign has been creating National Adoption Awareness Week, which will be running this coming week.
Maggie Millar is an artist and an actor, too, though she never reached the heights of fame of Furness and Jackman. You might remember seeing her in Bellbird or Prisoner, or you might remember her in Neighbours as the Reverend Rosie Hoyland. Millar has also been a stalwart of Australian theatre and has been praised by critics as warm, lusty and downright brilliant.
One reason, perhaps, for the brilliance of her acting was that she had plenty of practice, even as a little girl. You see, Millar was adopted and she never quite got the knack of being part of her adoptive family. ''All of my relatives were like aliens to me; as I no doubt was to them,'' she says. After a troubled childhood, Millar found out at 17 that she was adopted.
It wasn't until many years later, when she read a book by Nancy Verrier, that she finally understood her anguish. Verrier is a US psychotherapist specialising in adoption issues. She is also an adoptive parent. Her first book, The Primal Wound, has been welcomed by adoptees worldwide as their bible.
According to Verrier, the infant and mother are still connected outside the womb - physiologically, psychologically and spiritually. The infant, she says, knows the mother's smell, voice, heartbeat, energy and skin. On adoption, the separation results in a terrible feeling of abandonment that is indelibly printed upon the unconscious mind of the child. The grief of separation is so profound that it causes a searing wound, a primal wound.
It is because of the fear of being abandoned again that adopted children often display two types of behaviour. They will either be provocative, rebellious and angry, or they will become withdrawn, compliant and forever on guard. Sometimes they will display a combination of both behaviours.
Millar says the pain of separation and the subsequent loss of identity is accentuated for inter-country adoptees. ''The statistics around these adoptees are only now coming to light and they are disturbing,'' she says. ''They have much higher rates of suicide and depression than children who are adopted within their own countries. Many of these adoptees go back to their country of origin but even there they do not feel at home, they are dispossessed, their identity stolen.''
Furness' organisation is called Orphan Angels. She has quoted UNICEF figures claiming there are 103 million orphans in the Third World. That number is a misrepresentation. UNICEF defines an orphan as a child who has lost one parent. The true figure for what most of us would regard as orphans is closer to 13 million children, and most of these are living with extended family - in poverty.
Trafficking, kidnapping and exploitation of children and their parents abounds when agencies offer huge sums of money in an impoverished country. Graphic cases of corrupt practices connected to the adoption industry in Ethiopia were exposed by the ABC's Foreign Correspondent program in September.
When Madonna and Angelina pick out babies from orphanages like dolls from a shelf, they are sending a message that children are a commodity. ''Wealthy people have the power and means to buy a child,'' Millar says, ''but the child and her family have little or no power over what is happening to them.'' Adoptees, she says, are the only people suffering from a profound trauma who are supposed to be grateful.
Millar feels for gay or infertile people who long for a child, but she asks them to think of the rights of the child they are adopting. ''Someone else's child is not a cure for infertility. No one is entitled to a child, especially to someone else's child. Adoption should be a last resort and should be done with eyes wide open. Be aware of the consequences … Be educated and be prepared for a long journey. Not all adoptions are unsuccessful but all adoptions take a lot of work.''
Reform of adoption procedures was a hard-won battle resulting in the 1984 Victorian Adoption Act. This gave adoptees access to their records. When the legislation came into force, some 7000 people in Victoria alone queued up, waiting to find out who they were. Now the general benefits of this hard-won battle are being eroded.
The push for inter-country adoption is generally misguided. People who wish to help children of the third world should start by helping them within their own country, their own culture and their own tribe.
Dianne Dempsey is a Melbourne writer. For more information on overseas adoption, visit NancyVerrier.com,Vanish.org.au.

Britain to apologize over forced child migrants to Canada