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Building a ‘wonderful family’ through adoption

Marshall couple finds good solution for their desire in becoming parents

MARSHALL — Jason and Amber Swenson wanted a family after they first got married, so they turned to the adoption system.

More than a decade later they’re the proud parents of two adoptive sons, Leo and Brayden. They adopted Leo in 2013 and Brayden in 2019.

They said they turned to adoption after efforts to have children on their own did not result in pregnancy. They chose it rather than going through fertility specialists.

“It just came up in a conversation one day,” Amber said. “We’d both had thoughts about adoption and were very interested in it. Things went forward based on that.”

Danish adoptees demand an investigation into the adoption process in South Korea

Nanna Nørby Hansen

53 people, via the group Danish Korean Rights Group, have today demanded from the South Korean government an investigation into the circumstances of adoptions from South Korea to Denmark in the 1970s and 1980s.

They do so on the basis of testimony that adoption information has been incorrect.

According to AP News , the group believes that some of the adoptions were corrupt and that the children were wrongly registered as orphans.

- The Korean state at that time stamped many papers saying that people were found on the street. If you do a little math, it would mean that from the 1970s and 1980s Seoul would be flooded with baskets of children lying around on the street, says Peter Møller, who is a lawyer and co-leader of Danish Korean Rights Group.

Thirty years later, how a son helped nab his mother’s rapists

Savita was 12 when she was raped. A DNA test from her son, born out of her rape, helped the police track down the accused.

On the morning of August 11, Savita, 42, was getting ready to leave for work when she received a phone call from her lawyer.

He told her the Uttar Pradesh police had arrested two men for repeatedly raping Savita nearly 30 years ago. Savita had been 12 at the time.

“I felt relief, exhaustion, sadness, joy, anger – all at once,” Savita told Newslaundry. “I want to see both of them once and give them one slap. They ruined my life.”

As a result of the rapes, Savita had delivered a child when she was 13 years old. It was a DNA test that matched the child to one of the accused which led the police to finally make the arrests. The two men – Mohammad Razi, 48, and Naqi Hasan, 51 – are brothers.

Their adoptions broke. Their lives fractured. Now they strive to make things better for others.

Tens of thousands of children have suffered the collapse of both their birth and adoptive families. Their pain has largely existed in the shadows, shielded from broad public view and the dominant narrative of a happily ever after.

Though most adoptions remain intact, a USA TODAY investigation found more than 66,000 adoptees ended up in the foster care system between 2008 and 2020. That is an undercount. Many states are bad at tracking adoption failure. And some adoptions break outside the child welfare system’s view, when youth informally move in with other people, are privately readopted, return to their birth countries or live on the streets.

After these adoptees’ adoptive families fractured, they used their experience as fuel to improve the system for others. Here are their stories:

Explore the series: ‘A broken system’ leaves tens of thousands of adoptees without families, homes

Matthew Peiffer

Experience story Danielle

As a baby, Daniëlle Schipper (38) was adopted from Colombia. Despite her happy childhood and warm bond with her adoptive parents, she began to suffer from depression around the age of 19. In 2009 - Daniëlle had just become a mother - a floodgate of unprocessed grief opened and she developed a severe depression. "I weighed only 49 kilos and had suicidal thoughts."

'Looking back, I've struggled with my adoption since I was a teenager,' says Daniëlle. “But at the time, I didn't reach the right door for help. When I was again bothered by this all-consuming miserable feeling at the age of 23, I went to my doctor. He prescribed antidepressants and after a few weeks of feeling even worse, it started working happily. The sharpness of the miserable feeling disappeared, but I also felt different, flatter than before. I took that into the bargain because anything was better than a depression.'

'I became a mother and a floodgate of unprocessed grief opened'

'I had no identity'

Daniëlle's life goes on for a number of years until things really go wrong in 2009. 'I became a mother and together with this wonderful event, a floodgate of unresolved grief opened. I struggled with the true story of my adoption, which I had not been told until I was 14. My adoptive parents then told me that I had no identity in Colombia and therefore had received the passport of a deceased child: Beatriz. She was supposed to be adopted by my parents but died before that time.

'He calls me Dad.' Guardian raises money to adopt boy he found in trash in his native Haiti

(CNN)Jimmy Amisial was walking through Gonaives, Haiti, on his way to a New Year's Eve party to ring in 2018 when he spotted a large crowd and approached it.

"When I got to the place where the people were making noise I saw a baby," said Amisial, 22 at the time and visiting his homeland on a break from school in Texas. "It was in a pile of trash crying, and there wasn't a single soul who wanted to do anything about it."

While the locals were afraid to touch the infant because they feared the child was either cursed or evil, Amisial said, he nervously picked him up.

"He had no clothes on. He had fire ants crawling all over him because he's been there for a couple of hours. When I picked him up he immediately stopped crying."

A bond was made and now, more than four years later, Amisial is trying to make fatherhood official by formally adopting the boy he has not let go of since that night.

Mumbai woman moves court to get baby son back from adoption racket

MUMBAI: A 25-year-old woman, unwed when she gave up her son up for adoption last year, ran into a trafficking ring when she wanted the boy back after she got married to his father. She has been forced to approach courts for custody of her year-old baby, reports Rebecca Samervel.

Julia Fernandez, who 'facilitated' the adoption, was arrested earlier this month with an alleged aide Shabana Sheikh for trying to sell a newborn girl for Rs 4.5 lakh.

The Ulhasnagar woman moved the civil court last week to "recover" her son from a Malad couple who had taken him from Fernandez. In a plea submitted through Edith Dey and Mikhail Dey, the mother sought the court "to direct the DCP, ACP and senior police inspector of Bangur Nagar police station, to assist her in recovering her child from the respondents (adoptive parents) who are living within the jurisdiction of Bangur Nagar police station."

The plea will come up for hearing on August 24. The mother said that due to personal and financial difficulties, she was unable to raise the baby and was advised to approach one Julia Fernandez. The mother said that Julia informed her that she had an NGO and would help look after the baby until things settled down and she was in a state to take back the child. The mother said that Julia facilitated adoption of her baby son and informed her that the adoptive couple was wealthy and would look after him well.

In March this year, the civil court had rejected the plea by the Malad couple to be declared the adoptive parents of the boy. The biological mother had told the court then that her husband and she wanted their son back. However, the mother said she never received custody of her child despite the court's orders. "Despite the rejection of the adoption petition, the respondents did not return the baby and are till date illegally holding the custody of the child," the mother's plea said. The mother said that her husband and she had tried to contact the couple several times, through Julia, however, she kept giving excuses and later began threatening to complain to the police.

Mumbai woman moves court to get baby son back from adoption racket

MUMBAI: A 25-year-old woman, unwed when she gave up her son up for adoption last year, ran into a trafficking ring when she wanted the boy back after she got married to his father. She has been forced to approach courts for custody of her year-old baby, reports Rebecca Samervel.

Julia Fernandez, who 'facilitated' the adoption, was arrested earlier this month with an alleged aide Shabana Sheikh for trying to sell a newborn girl for Rs 4.5 lakh.

The Ulhasnagar woman moved the civil court last week to "recover" her son from a Malad couple who had taken him from Fernandez. In a plea submitted through Edith Dey and Mikhail Dey, the mother sought the court "to direct the DCP, ACP and senior police inspector of Bangur Nagar police station, to assist her in recovering her child from the respondents (adoptive parents) who are living within the jurisdiction of Bangur Nagar police station."

The plea will come up for hearing on August 24. The mother said that due to personal and financial difficulties, she was unable to raise the baby and was advised to approach one Julia Fernandez. The mother said that Julia informed her that she had an NGO and would help look after the baby until things settled down and she was in a state to take back the child. The mother said that Julia facilitated adoption of her baby son and informed her that the adoptive couple was wealthy and would look after him well.

In March this year, the civil court had rejected the plea by the Malad couple to be declared the adoptive parents of the boy. The biological mother had told the court then that her husband and she wanted their son back. However, the mother said she never received custody of her child despite the court's orders. "Despite the rejection of the adoption petition, the respondents did not return the baby and are till date illegally holding the custody of the child," the mother's plea said. The mother said that her husband and she had tried to contact the couple several times, through Julia, however, she kept giving excuses and later began threatening to complain to the police.

A UK feminist throws a grenade into the surrogacy debate

Julie Bindel, one of Britain’s best-known radical feminists, has written a savage critique of commercial surrogacy in Prospect, a progressive magazine. Bindel is a “political lesbian” and has campaigned for many years against prostitution, pornography, and rape, and more recently against transgenderism. Here are a few paragraphs from her article, “Why commercial surrogacy is little better than the sex trade”.

I’m concerned about all children born to surrogates. None of the protections that reputable adoption agencies put in place before parents are approved such as criminal background checks, mandatory participation in adoptive parent preparation classes, assurance that the adoptive families are medically, financially and mentally stable and comprehensive home visits, are required. Although some surrogacy clinics may do these checks, there is no legal requirement for them.

Surrogacy is exploitation whether it is carried out for profit or altruism. The harm to surrogate mothers is well documented, especially now that former surrogates are speaking out about their experiences. The law should reflect this, and outlaw all formal surrogacy arrangements. The surrogates themselves—lured in by the promise of money, and by suggestions that surrogacy is altruistic, and they are “helping a family”—should never be criminalised, but the brokers and other profiteers should.

The buying and selling of women’s bodies for reproduction is supported by many on the left—a notable exception to their usual critique of capitalism. In fact, surrogacy in the US is celebrated and seen as little different to purchasing an airline ticket. The women in the system have no name, no voice, no identity. The state allows the trafficking of their reproductive system, with a high risk of maternal mortality, protecting only her right to be paid. The surrogacy trade is similar to the sex trafficking and mail-order bride industries—in that the female body, in one way or another, is the merchandise for sale.

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