Weekend to remember

t your paths." (Prov. 3:5-6)

02 April 2010

A weekend to REMEMBER!!!!!! March 26-28, 2010

Well, the journey to revisit the beginning years of my life has begun...I am not sure that I will have closure, answers or complete healing in the coming weeks or months that lie ahead...but I am trying to let God hold me through this journey. Last weekend, Don and I flew into Atlanta, GA for Ms. Betty Tisdale's An Lac Orphans Reunion in Columbus, GA!!!!!

My American Twin, Heather & me :)

After arriving into Atlanta, our dear friends that we met in Vietnam- 3 years ago - to adopt our babies met us at the airport to go to dinner. We have been blessed beyond words to have Jason, Heather and Rocco Willis to travel, bond and connect with during our adoption pregnancy & after. We got to see Rocco on his birthday weekend, reminiscing when we were coming home to the States with our babies on Rocco's longest and first birthday ever. Because of the time zones & traveling, March 29, 2007 ended up being like 36 hours :).

Kim-Lan with Ms. Betty Tisdale & Ms. Truc (Mdm. Ngai's niece)

It was an honor to meet and thank in person the woman that helped get me out of Vietnam, 35 years ago. I was in one orphanage then transferred to An Lac, then airlifted out with over 200 other babies. I arrived in the States mid April, landed in CA, then onto GA. I was then escorted to Detroit, MI on Tax Day = April 15, 1975 to my mom & grandma.

I had the pleasure of meeting Ms. Truc at the airport and finding our way to the Columbus shuttle together. Ms. Truc was Madame Ngai's niece, the VN Director of An Lac Orphanage. Mdm. Ngai came to the States after the fall of Saigon in 1975 and died 3 years later, 1978 at the age of 73. We had a memorial service for Mdm. Ngai at her grave site. Local & Fox National News covered the whole weekend.

There were over 50 adoptees gathered here to honor, thank and hug Ms. Betty Tisdale & Ms. Truc.

Well, I got to meet the FIRST, taller, prettier Kim-Lan in Ms. Betty's life!!! Betty's 4 daughters came to the GA reunion and they are so beautiful, precious and kind in person as I imagined they would be.

From Left to Right in the picture above: MaiLara, Kim-Lan (me), Ms. Betty, Xuan, TuVan, Kim Lan (Betty's daughter).

I am packing now for the next BIG trip to Saigon, Vietnam - in less than 2 days....WOW!!!! Yikes...I'm not sure what I'm feeling but I am thinking, I can't believe the time has come, months of planning, dreaming, praying, waiting...coming down to this moment in time.

Persons: Vu Thi Ngai, Betty Tisdale

Frustrations

THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 25, 2010

Frustrations

Today's visits brought a mixture of emotions, the most prominent being frustration. The morning visits are always difficult because there are constantly people coming in and out of the room to"check on us" (we really don't need to be checked on. . .Lily doesn't speak much, instead she uses gestures and those are generally universal. . if she needs something, I recognize it and can help her, or she helps herself. . she is very independent). Whenever someone comes into the room to "check on us" she thinks it is time to go and, once she gets something in her head, she wants to follow through. She will start waiving goodbye and packing my bag and tries to head back to her group. Trying to convince her otherwise or distract her is a difficult task and it leaves us both a bit frustrated. This happened no less than 10 times during our 2 hour visit this morning.

The most frustrating interruption was when the head nurse came in. We met her yesterday and she informed us that she was Lily's favorite (doesn't think much of herself does she!?). Today she wanted to illustrate that point so she bounded into the room about halfway through the visit, grabbed Lily (we were in the middle of playing a game) and started tickling, hugging and kissing her. I immediately got the feeling that she was trying to prove that Lily liked her better than me and that she was happy here in the orphanage (though I tried to tell myself that she really just wanted me to see that Lily is well loved and cared for. . .that interpretation at least made me feel less frustrated in the moment). When I shared my feelings with Toni, she agreed that she had gotten the same vibe and I appreciated the validation.

The afternoon visit started wonderfully. Lily was very interactive and we were enjoying playing together. She LOVES to look out the window at the cars and this afternoon it was raining so there was even more excitement for her out the window. I picked her up to let her look out and she allowed me to hold her for about 30 minutes (she doesn't normally stay in one place that long, so I cherished the opportunity to snuggle her for awhile). While I held her she rested her head against my shoulder and we shared some kisses and snuggles. It was pure bliss! While we were standing at the window the head nurse walked into the building. She saw us and she waved. I had a feeling that we would be in for another visit and sure enough, 15 minutes before the visit was over she bounds into the room again, pulls Lily onto her lap and begins to hug and kiss her (Lily climbed down as soon as the opportunity presented itself). She started telling us all about how they take the kids to the zoo and the playground when the weather is nice and that, on their birthdays, they get to go to the bakery and eat sweets. Normally I would think that she was sharing this information so that we would know how wonderfully the kids are cared for (and I am VERY grateful that they are. . .that fact alone will make it easier for me to sleep at night knowing that Lily is so well loved and cared for while we wait to bring her home), but with this woman, it was obvious that she was trying to send the message that Lily was doing just fine right where she was and that she didn't need to be adopted. Very frustrating.

The orphange in Stara Zagora is WONDERFUL and the caregivers really do love these children ,BUT. . . it is still an orphanage and, even if the children there are wonderfully loved and cared for, at some point they will be sent to institutions or will age out of the system and then what?? An orphanage is an orphanage and it is no substitute for a loving and PERMANENT home and family.

It is obvious that this woman truly loves Lily and I am sure the thought of her leaving saddens her, but I hope that she will rejoice in knowing that Lily will be equally loved and cared for in our family and in knowing that her future is secure. Lily is an incredible little girl and it is obvious that she has already touched MANY hearts with her sweet, spunky spirit. I really do feel it a privilege to have the opportunity to be her mama.

Tomorrow morning will be my last visit with Lily before we head back to Sofia for the weekend. I am sad to go, but anxious to get started on the next phase of this process so that I can get her home. Before I left home, Maren and I made bears at Build-A-Bear for each of the girls that say "I love you," in Bulgarian and English. I will be leaving that with her (hopefully it will remain with HER) along with a picture album and I do hope that her caregivers will tell her often that mama will be back for her soon.

It has been a wonderful week and I am looking forward to a relaxing weekend and to getting to know Little Lady #2 next week!

Organizations: Stara Zagora, Bulgaria, Reece's Rainbow

Aantal adopties in Vlaanderen stijgt

woensdag 26 mei 2010, 07u40 Bron: belga

Het aantal adopties via erkende diensten is vorig jaar in Vlaanderen toegenomen met 12 procent. Dat meldt de Vlaamse Centrale Autoriteit voor Adoptie dinsdag. Het gaat vooral om kinderen uit het buitenland.

In het jaar 2009 werden 268 kinderen geadopteerd, tegenover 239 in 2008. De stijging is een gevolg van het toegenomen aantal adopties vanuit het buitenland (interlandelijke adoptie). Vorig jaar werden in Vlaanderen immers 244 kinderen vanuit het buitenland geadopteerd, tegenover 210 in 2008. Het aantal binnenlandse adopties liep terug van 29 naar 24.

De 244 kinderen (130 jongens en 114 meisjes) die via bemiddeling van adoptiediensten vanuit het buitenland in Vlaamse adoptiegezinnen zullen opgroeien, komen vooral uit Ethiopië (97) en Kazachstan (58). Ook werden in 2009 voor het eerst sinds lang opnieuw adoptiekinderen uit Haïti geplaatst.

Bij de 24 binnenlands geadopteerde kinderen in 2009 gaat het om 13 jongens en 11 meisjes. Het gaat om in België geboren kinderen die door hun ouders werden afgestaan voor adoptie. Binnenlandse adopties kunnen ook op zelfstandige wijze plaatsvinden. Het gaat dan om kinderen die vooraf gekend zijn door de kandidaat-adoptieouders.

Countries: Kazakhstan, Ethiopia, Belgium

UPDATE: DOS Adoption Alert Nepal

UPDATE: DOS Adoption Alert Nepal
U.S. DEPARTMENT OF STATE
Bureau of Consular Affairs
Office of Children’s Issues

Caution About Pursuing Adoption in Nepal

May 26, 2010

The U.S. Department of State strongly discourages prospective adoptive parents from choosing adoption in Nepal because of grave concerns about the reliability of Nepal’s adoption system and the accuracy of the information in children’s official files. The Department also strongly discourages adoption service providers from accepting new applications for adoption from Nepal until reforms are made, and asks them to be vigilant about possible unethical or illegal activities under the current adoption system.

The Hague Conference on Private International Law recently released a report on its Intercountry Adoption Technical Assistance Program, based on a visit by a delegate from the Hague Conference’s Permanent Bureau to Nepal in November 2009, available at (http://www.hcch.net/upload/wop/nepal_rpt09.pdf). This report is the result of an independent analysis of Nepal’s intercountry adoption system under the new Terms and Conditions put in place in 2008. The report details a number of weaknesses in Nepal’s adoption system, including ongoing concern about the falsification of documents, improper financial gain, and lack of a child protection system.

Although the U.S. Embassy in Nepal has only seen a handful of adoption cases since the new Terms and Conditions went into effect, we share many of the concerns outlined in the Hague report. As a case in point, in one of the first cases processed by the Government of Nepal after the revision of the Terms and Conditions, the U.S. Embassy in Kathmandu found that the adopted child was not a true orphan and that the birth parents were actively searching for the child.

We encourage parents who have filed an application with the Ministry of Women, Children and Social Welfare (MoWCSW) in Nepal, but have not yet been matched with a child or received an Adoption Decree issued by the Government of Nepal, to consider a change of countries. The United States Citizenship and Immigration Services (USCIS) allow one change of country to be made in connection with one’s I-600A application without fee. A request to change countries should be made in writing to the USCIS Field Office where the I-600A was originally filed. More information about how to request a change of country can be found on the USCIS website at www.uscis.gov (Any subsequent request for a change of country would require a fee.).

Hague-accredited U.S. adoption services providers, and adoption service providers that may apply for Hague accreditation in the future are reminded that their actions in facilitating and/or processing adoptions in any country (whether Hague or non-Hague) will be evaluated during the Hague accreditation or accreditation renewal processes in accordance with the accreditation regulations (22 CFR Part 96), including whether, among other things, the provider has established and rigorously followed ethical adoption practices and operates in the best interest of prospective adoptive children.

Consular Officers are required to conduct an I-604 investigation to verify the child’s orphan status prior to immigrant visa processing. We generally rely upon the host government’s diligence to protect the safety and interests of their own children through careful administration of their national adoption process and use the I-604 investigation to confirm that this process has been followed. Because Nepal’s adoption process is questionable, it can be very difficult to satisfy the requirements of the I-604 investigation. Thus, these investigations could take a matter of months. Prospective adoptive parents are advised that they need to have flexible travel plans and be prepared to stay in Nepal while awaiting the results of the I-604 investigation or plan to make two trips (one to finalize the adoption and a second after the I-604 investigation is completed to bring their child home.)

When an I-600 is adjudicated by USCIS in the United States, consular officers must then conduct an I-604 investigation once the approved petition reaches the Embassy in Nepal to verify the child’s orphan status prior to immigrant visa processing. For I-600 applications filed at the U.S. Embassy in Kathmandu, the I-604 investigation is initiated after the prospective adoptive parents have appeared before a consular officer to sign the application.

Both DOS and USCIS recognize that it would be preferable for the I-604 investigations to be completed earlier in the process. However, under current procedures, the U.S. Embassy cannot begin the I-604 investigation until the PAPs have filed their I-600 application and have submitted the necessary documents pertaining to the adoptive child, such as police reports, newspaper announcements and certification of orphan status. The Department of State and USCIS are currently in discussion about possible ways to revise the procedures under U.S. Government control to mitigate this problem.

The U.S. Embassy in Kathmandu continues to meet with officials within the Government of Nepal and with other foreign missions concerning the current status of adoptions in Nepal. The February 25, 2010 joint statement issued by the International Adoption Working Group (an ad hoc group of Embassies in Nepal who have an interest in intercountry adoption issues) may be found athttp://nepal.usembassy.gov/pr-2-24-2010.html.

Adoptive parents may contact the Embassy at adoptionsnepal@state.gov if they have questions.

Please continue to monitor http://adoption.state.gov for updated information as it becomes available.

http://adoption.state.gov/news/nepal.html

Countries: Nepal

Child Protection Bulgaria

CHILD PROTECTION

Bulgaria

Bulgaria has the highest rate of child institutionalisation in Europe, with an estimated 16,000 – 20,000 children living in orphanages. Less than 2% of these children are thought to be orphans.

ARK has worked in partnership with the Bulgarian Government since 2006 to plan and support reform of long-term institutional care in the Municipality of Stara Zagora (home to the highest number of institutionalised children in the country). This was the first time the Government had ever explicitly committed to the replacement of large-scale, long-term institutional care with family and community based services and marked a huge breakthrough for both ARK and the future of child-care in Bulgaria

In 2008, ARK closed Nadejda Home for Children Deprived of Parental Care, completing Bulgaria’s first quality institutional closure. In addition, over 60 further children have been moved from other institutions. All children have been reintegrated with their immediate or extended family or found homes with foster carers, adoptive families or in Small Group Homes.

Organizations: Stara Zagora, Bulgaria, Nadejda Home, Bulgaria, Absolute Return for Kids (ARK)

Bulgarian President at Mogilino

28/09/2008

The Bulgarian President Georgi Parvanov visited the children and young adults at Mogilino social care home last week. The visit was part of an official tour of social care conditions in the region. Officials from the municipality of Russe guided the President around the home as well as taking him to the nearby Nadejda home where 12 children have been placed from Mogilino. Experts explained they are working with parents who have placed their children in institutional care previously, to now take them back and rebuild their family group. To date 3 children from Mogilino have started the process of reintegration with their families.

Despite the government’s announcement that the home will close at the end of year, 42 residents remain at the Mogilino home and plans for their future care is still undecided. There is particular concern that if no suitable placements can be found, the young adults risk being sent to the dreaded adult institutions.

Back to news

Organizations: Nadejda Home, Bulgaria

ARK Bulgaria - Small Group Homes for Children Leaving Institutional Care

December 2007, 07/12/2007

Dear Valued Stara Planina Properties Client,

Christmas is time to be with the family and enjoy the warmth of home but it is also time to remember the people in need.

ARK Bulgaria - Small Group Homes for Children Leaving Institutional Care

Some of you may have watched the recent BBC broadcast concerning Bulgarian orphanages. It was a very negative portrayal of the plight of the kids living in one of these institutions. Bulgaria has an extremely poor legacy from the communist times when all the homeless kids had to be hidden not to disturb the perception of the "ideal" society. Nowadays the Bulgarian society does not accept the situation with the kids in the state institutions and there are many positive examples however the knowledge and experience how to bring the kids back to the community had to be brought to Bulgaria from other European countries which have had more positive experience dealing with such problems.

ARK is a UK charity, committed to transforming the lives of these children by providing them with better care, wherever possible based in families. ARK Bulgaria is developing foster care and adoption services and wherever possible supporting parents to take their children back home. Laura Partker, Managing Director of ARK Bulgaria, explained more about one of their projects in the Bulgarian city of Stara Zagora.

"Throughout Bulgaria, several thousand children live in institutions - often called 'orphanages', although only 2% of the children in these homes have no parents. These children are often very isolated, going to school as well as living in the institutions with little chance to socialise with others. The care which they receive does not allow them to develop fully and the emotional, intellectual and physical developmental damage which the children experience is often irreversible.

Unfortunately, it is not possible to find family placements for all of the children. For those who have nowhere else to go, ARK is developing small-scale, high quality children's homes. In these 'Small Group Homes', 8 children will live with teams of dedicated, trained carers.

ARK is piloting this new approach for the first time in Bulgaria in Stara Zagora where 5 Small Group Homes are currently being finalised. Working with 'Stara Planina Properties', ARK has financed the refurbishment of two properties provided by the Municipality, built one home on Municipal land and purchased two apartments.

The first of the Small Group Homes opened in September 2007; the last one will open at the end of December. A total of 40 children will leave the institution Nadejda to live in these new homes - and to enjoy a quality of care and individual attention which will radically improve their long-term life chances.

After only a few weeks we have already seen dramatic differences in the behaviour of the children who moved into the new homes in September. Their physical appearance has also started to change: all of the children are putting on weight and one little girl who suffers from alopecia now has hair growing. The children are thriving, loving going to school in the community and enjoying having their own home and possessions - in many cases, for the first time in their lives."

Eva Ward, an expert involved in the creation of the model being applied in Stara Zagora, have assessed the needs of the kids for toys.

"It has been difficult to be able to buy enough for the five homes from our budget. Our children have never actually had any proper toys before and we are desperate to give them the opportunity of some good quality play materials. I took a plastic tea set and a simple road track and cars to each of the three established Small Group Homes recently and could not believe the excitement and pleasure the children got from them.

The children are aged between 3 and 7 but many have developmental delay and need the kind of toys normally enjoyed by younger children - this will also help us to work with development issues. These are some ideas -

Cuddly soft toys - we would like each child to have a good quality teddy or other animal soft toy to keep on their beds and to cuddle at bedtime. This would be their very own and they would keep it forever! There would need to be 8 different types to ensure that there are not two the same in each home - so no confusion or fights! The children have never had anything of their own before.

Baby dolls - we would like one for each Small Group Homes - again quite a big one so it is like a real baby. We do lots of 'playing families' with the children which is very much 'learning through play' as of course our children have no idea about families or caring for babies. There are quite nice ones that come in a set with baby bottles and various extras! A dolls pram or pushchair for the above baby!

Strong plastic trucks and cars - the children are quite heavy handed with toys due to their lack of experience and so toys need to be as robust as possible.

Lego or other building/construction toys - I know lego is very expensive but it is such good value for co-ordination and concentration. We will try to accumulate collections for each Small Group Homes over time.

Educational toys - I've seen sets of matching cards (classic pairs games) and numbers games etc here now. Anything in this category is always welcome.

If by any chance you are in the UK and wish to buy from there absolutely anything from the Early Learning Centre would be fantastic!"

Each home is fully equipped but there are items which would be good to have in addition to what has been provided by the foundation. These are kitchen robots (one costing about 80 levs), toasters (40 levs), kettles (35 levs) for each home and one camera for all the kids so that they have pictures of their birthdays, Christmas parties, first school days and other event arranged in their own albums.

The team of Stara Planina Properties' Sofia office were touched by the kids and bought winter jackets for all of them. We will also contribute to purchase some toys and other necessary items but the kids grow and always need support - new toys, clothes, shoes. So if any of you, our clients, wish to contribute we will be able to help with the logistics.

If you would like to learn more about ARK's work or are interested in supporting the programme, please do get in touch with Laura Parker, Managing Director of ARK Bulgaria - Laura@arkonline.org, tel: 00 359 (0) 2 983 3480 / mobile: 00 359 (0) 889 223 467.

Bulgarian Christmas Charity Launched for the Fifth Time

The fifth consecutive charity campaign Bulgarian Christmas was launched on 1st December. This is the most popular charity campaign in Bulgaria and more and more funds have been donated every other year.

Bulgarian Christmas raises funds for medical treatment of children and for purchase of medical equipment for children hospitals. Bulgarian Christmas 2007 aims at helping 37 children. The former four campaigns raised over 7 million levs. The sum was utilised for medical treatment of nearly 170 children. Almost 50 children wards received equipment worth nearly 6 million levs.

Main organisers of the initiative are Bulgaria's President Georgi Parvanov, Bulgarian National Television and other media.

Kostelich, Aamod and Girardelli To Visit Bansko for Opening of The Ski Season

The stars of the world alpine skiing Yanitsa Kostelich, Kjetil Andre Aamod and Marc Girardelli will be official guests of the opening of the ski season in the winter resort of Bansko on December 15th.

This summer the Bansko ski zones were upgrated and equipped with additional snow machines. There is a new lift with capacity of 2,000 passengers per hour as well as a draw lift for beginners. Other extras have also been added such as facilities for night skiing. The total length of the pistes is now 70 km and the snow guns - from 75 last winter are 160.

Monthly Travel Guide

Below is a link to the Jamadvice HRG Bulgaria Monthly Travel Guide. It provides useful information as well as some interesting facts from the travel industry.

Organizations: Absolute Return for Kids (ARK), Nadejda Home, Bulgaria, Stara Zagora, Bulgaria

Persons: Laura Parker

Countries: Bulgaria

ASSOCIATION OF ACCREDITED ADOPTION ORGANISATIONS Final programme – “Open Days” - 22. – 23. April 2010 “GOOD PRACTICE IN INTER-CO

ASSOCIATION OF ACCREDITED ADOPTION ORGANISATIONS

Final programme – “Open Days” - 22. – 23. April 2010

“GOOD PRACTICE IN INTER-COUNTRY ADOPTIONS”

English will be the only working language.

Thursday 22nd April: Open Day (half day)

Organizations: Euradopt

Adoption agencies: the shift from evaluators to partners in adoption

Lana Douglas

By Lana Douglas

Published: Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Updated: Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Countries: Vietnam, United States of America

Organizations: Bethany Christian Services

'US couple didn't tend to adopted kid'

'US couple didn't tend to adopted kid' Mayura Janwalkar / DNA, DNASaturday, February 6, 2010 0:24 IST Mumbai: Five years after the Bombay high court granted the guardianship of two abandoned minors to a US couple, it revoked its order in case of the older child observing that the couple had failed to fulfill their responsibility towards the child. Mita (name changed), now 14, was found abandoned at the Grant Road station along with her younger sister. As the children had no claimants, they were both declared free for adoption by the Child Welfare Committee. Subsequently, they were adopted by Wilbur and Jennifer Baker from Massachusetts, USA, with the high court’s sanction in April 2006. However, the court was informed that the couple had to send the child to a psychiatric care institution in the US, as she faced adjustment disorder, attention deficit, depressive condition and hyperactivity. The court was told when the couple refused to take her back home from the hospital, the American adoption agency Wide Horizons for Children (WHC) tried to place the child with another family but she was subsequently repatriated to India. Justice DY Chandrachud observed, “The Bakers have failed to perform their duties as a result of which Mita was repatriated.” The court then revoked the order of guardianship granted in their favour citing the abuse of the trust reposed in them. Mita had been lodged at the National Institute of Mental Health and Neurosciences in Bangalore since August 2008 after her repatriation. The court has now handed over her guardianship, protem to the director of the Family Service Centre and permitted them to shift her to Aarushi, a care centre in Gurgaon. The court also directed Jagannath Pati of the Central Adoption Regulatory Authority to take into account the suggestions put forth by the federation of adoption agencies and finalise the guidelines for foreign adoptions by March 26. The draft guidelines had suggested the generation of a safety fund for repatriated children from failed foreign adoptions. The court has sought progress reports of Mita’s sister also adopted by the bakers and bi-annual progress reports of Mita from her guardians.

Organizations: Wide Horizons for Children, ACT CASE Melichars

Countries: United States of America, India